(DISCLAIMER: This blog is not for profit. All images used below are property of their respective companies unless stated otherwise. I do not claim ownership of this material. New to the blog? Start at the start with Snow White.)
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“A long time ago, in the faraway land of Ireland, there lived a little boy. This little boy loved the films of Walt Disney, more perhaps than anything else in the world. One dark and stormy night, an old beggar came to the door, seeking shelter from the never-ending Irish rain and the gentle whimsy of the locals. In payment for shelter, he offered the little boy a most precious gift; a VHS of Disney’s Beauty and the Beast. And the little boy said “Screw off. I hate that movie.”
The beggar stared at the little boy for a good two minutes. Finally, he said:
“I’m sorry, I must have misheard you. I thought you said you hated Beauty and the Beast.”
“I do.”
“That’s crazy talk.”
“It sucks.”
“It does not suck. It’s the greatest achievement in the history of animation. It’s hot stuff, you little shit.”
“It’s boring. It’s a boring, overhyped, whiter than white bread slice of pandering Oscar bait.”
Suddenly, the beggar transformed into a powerful magician with the most pimpin’ moustache the little boy had ever seen.
He cast a spell on the little boy, transforming him into an unshaved mouse. The mouse begged for mercy, and the Magician told him that there was one way that he could become a human again. He must review every one of the Disney animated canon one after the other, so that he might learn to love Beauty and the Beast. If he could not find it in his heart to love that movie, and be loved by it in return, he would remain a mouse forever. As the years passed, he fell into despair.
For who could ever learn to love…a boring, overhyped, whiter than white bread slice of pandering Oscar bait?”
Sigh. Let’s just get this over with.
Ohhhh…I’m gonna catch hell for this one.
Okay.
So.
Ahem.
Yeah.
I don’t really like Beauty and the Beast.
“Zeke! Run to the next town over, we need more men!”
“How many men?”
“ALL OF ‘EM!”
EVERYBODY CHILL!
Please, just step away from the comments! Let me explain!
It’s me. Okay? It’s me. It’s not the movie, it’s me. I know it’s not a bad movie. Hell, I know it’s a superb movie. And if you’re worried that I’m going to trash this movie that you love, and show you a whole bunch of flaws in it that you never noticed and ruin it for you forever, no. That’s not going to happen. I play fair on this blog, and this movie will be walking out with a very high score. Probably.
My dislike of this movie is, I freely admit, largely irrational. It’s kind of hard to put into words but…
Okay, the animation is top flight, the music and songs are some of Howard Ashman’s and Alan Menken’s best work, it has one of the best leads in the Disney canon…
But it’s just. So. WHITE.
It’s so white. It’s whiter than white. It’s “Gandalf after he comes back from the dead” white. It’s whiter than a Mitt Romney rally.
ARGH! MY EYES, I’M BLIND!
So there’s that. Plus, I don’t know if it’s just me, but there’s nothing more likely to push me into disliking something than being constantly told by everyone that I’m wrong, and I just don’t get it and that I should change my opinion because it’s clearly stupid and…oooooookay. I’m starting to realise why my wife hates Ariel now.
Yeah. Not so fun, is it?
Sorry. It’s just a movie I’ve never been able to fall in love with. But hey, maybe this review will finally give me the chance to see this film in a new light and break the curse once and for all. We can hope.
Production began on Beauty and the Beast back in 1989 and it was originally intended to be a very different film from the one we have now. But around six months into production, director Richard Purdum and producer Don Hahn were ordered to scrap everything and start again from square one, retooling the film as a Broadway-style musical with songs by Ashman and Menken.
Now why ever would they have done that? I declare the mystery unsolveable!
Ashman was eventually promoted from lyricist to goddamn executive producer, and probably had a bigger influence on the film than any other single person. Ashman worked tirelessly on this film, and with good reason. Ashman, like many thousands of other gay American men, was a victim of the AIDS epidemic of the eighties. He would live to finish all of the songs for this movie, and to learn of the movie’s rapturous reception at the New York film festival in an unfinished form. But he would not live to see the final film.
In my review of The Little Mermaid I called it “A Broadway musical in ink and paint” and I really, really should have held off on using that description because it fits Beauty and the Beast so much better. Ashman actually held auditions on Broadway itself and the resulting cast is pretty much wall to wall Broadway veterans. Also, the song-to-dialogue ratio in this movie is even more heavily skewed towards the songs which take up around twenty five minutes of the running time.
Richard Purdum, the original director, left once Ashman and Menken were brought on board as it was clear that Disney were going to make a very different movie from what he had originally intended.
Princesses and songs! NOW! Those cavemen are NOT fucking around!
Replacing him were two young newcomers named Kirk Wise and Gary Trousdale, whose previous experience prior to helming this multi-million dollar animated feature was…an animated short for the Disney Land attraction Cranium Command. I’m not joking. Well, actually, their lack of experience was part of the reason they were hired. Eisner and Katzenberg simply wanted someone to ride herd on the animators who in turn could be easily ridden by Eisner and Katzenberg.
Huh huh huh huh.
After Purdum’s departure, they were looking for directors who would be under no illusions as to who was in charge. In fact, at the beginning Wise and Trousdale were referred to as “Acting Directors”, which Trousdale would later describe as “acting like a director in the hope that direction would happen.” But as it turned out, Kirk and Trousdale rose to the challenge and proved themselves to be very competent, prompting Katzenberg to promote them to “directors”.
The generation of young animators that had come on board around the time of The Fox and the Hound had now fully matured into probably the most accomplished animation team in the world. This would be the last film that they would all work together on, as from then on the studio would work on two movies simultaneously with the animation team being split in two. Many of the people who worked on this film consider it to be the crowning achievement of the renaissance, the true pinnacle. Are they right?
Well, let’s see if this thing can win me over.
Okay, so we begin with a view of the Beast’s castle deep in the forest and…oh goddamit.
Bambi’s mother AGAIN?
Well, at least she’s not about to be killed this time. But my God, how many times does this make? She’s everywhere! She’s like the Forest Gump of the Disney universe!
Well anyway, the Narrator (David Ogden Stiers), tells us that once upon a time in a “faraway land”…
Behold! The land of a thousand mysteries!
… there lived a young prince. Through a series of stained glass windows, we are told the story. The prince had everything his heart desired, but he was spoiled, selfish and cruel.
And an absolute terror with a crossbow.
An old beggar woman came to the castle one night and begged for shelter, offering only a single rose as payment. The Prince, repulsed by her haggard appearance (and probably a little pissed that he has to answer the door himself despite having more servants than Daddy Warbucks) tells her to screw off. The old crone turns into a beautiful enchantress and as punishment for the Prince’s cruelty, turns him into a beast and turns all his servants into household objects. Which…overkill much?
In fact, I have my suspicions about her identity. So we have a powerful sorceress who can turn into an old woman at will and will react with massive disproportionate retribution at the slightest offence. You know where I’m going with this.
Eric, what have you unleashed?
She gives him the rose, telling him that if someone hasn’t found a way to love his hideous mug before the last petal falls, he’ll be stuck like that. The Beast falls into a deep despair: “For who could ever learn to love etc, etc.”
We then skip forward ten years to our opening number; Belle. As well as being a great Broadway number, Belle is pretty much a masterclass in how to do exposition through song. Think about everything that we learn during the course of this number: We meet Belle, we learn that she loves reading, that she’s kind and good natured, that the rest of the town views her as something of an odd bird. But we also meet Gaston, learn that the whole town thinks he’s awesome and that he wants to marry Belle and thinks that he’s a shoo-in. That’s a lot of information, but the song is so well written and establishes the characters so effectively that we never feel overwhelmed.
Now, let’s talk about Belle. Belle is one of the elements of the movie that I don’t like and I feel really guilty for not liking. Because I get why people think she’s awesome. She’s smart, active, brave…hell she’s downright heroic at times. And maybe that’s the problem, she’s just a little too perfect. I mean, a character has to have flaws, right? I think that’s why I prefer Ariel to Belle. Ariel is stubbourn, and foolhardy and even a little selfish, but that just rounds her out for me. Belle is just a little too saintly for my liking. Also, I have to say I greatly prefer Jodie Benson’s work on Ariel to Paige O’Hara’s portrayal of Belle. Now, O’Hara is excellent, don’t get me wrong. But she gives Belle’s voice this kind of trembling quality that makes the character sound a lot more vulnerable and helpless than she actually is.
I like Gaston a lot though. Richard White who voices the character has an absolutely incredible voice, just booming with raw power and machismo. Also, enjoy him while he lasts because the next movie is Aladdin and pretty much every villain from then on is going to be some variation on Jafar. Gaston is pretty unique in the canon in that it’s not at all apparent that he’s the villain until quite late in the movie. He’s not particularly smart or threatening, and you’d be forgiven for thinking that after Belle turns down his advances we’ll never see him again. His transformation from comic antagonist into out and out psychopath is effectively done, and of course perfectly mirrors the Beast’s own journey from monster to nobleman. Anyway, Gaston is so fixated on getting Belle that he ignores the advances of triplets (!) and tells her the whole town is getting creeped out by her reading and starting to suspect she may be a witch. He invites her back to his tavern to look at his trophies but she tells him she can’t, prompting the triplets (!) to complain “What’s the matter with her?”
What’s the matter with her?! What’s the matter with HIM!?
She says she has to go and help her father, prompting LeFou, Gaston’s little man-bitch, to remark “The crazy old loon! He needs all the help he can get!”
Belle angrily says that her father’s not crazy, only for her house to blow up in the distance. She runs back to the house where Maurice, her father, is working on an automatic wood chopping machine which is basically an axe attached to a steam engine. You know, considering that the French Revolution can’t be that far into the future, I’m guessing Maurice’s invention is going to be put to uses he didn’t envision.
Doing this by hand? What are we, savages?
With a little encouragement from Belle, Maurice manages to fix the machine and gets it to work. Before you know it, he’s heading off to the county fair to show off the machine with Phillipe, his trusty horse.
But Maurice and Philippe miss a turn and soon are wandering through a dark and eerie forest. Maurice stops at a roadsign, and realises that he may be more lost than he thought.
Faced with a fork in the road, one leading through a less scary part of the forest with birds chirping and one clearly leading to the very abyss of hell itself, Maurice obviously picks the second one.
Never going to reference Scary Movie again, so enjoy it while you can.
Unfortunately, it turns out that this forest is full of more wolves than a Stark family reunion and Philippe soon panics and leaves Maurice alone, stranded in the wood. He gets chases by wolves through the forest and finds his way to the Beast’s castle.
Okay, help me out here.
What was the Beast the prince of? I mean, this is not some unnamed fantasy kingdom. The movie explicitly says that it’s set in France. So, presumably the Beast was a French prince. So…why the fuck is his castle in the middle of a forest? Why isn’t he at Versailles? Come to that, where are his subjects? Who exactly does he rule over? We see his servants, sure. But where are the actual peasants that he rules and collects taxes from and claims droit de seigneur?
Anyway, Maurice enters the castle which is seemingly abandoned but is filled with strange whispering voices, like the island from Lost. Unlike the island from Lost, however, we are actually given an explantion for this. Cogsworth and Lumiere (David Ogden Stiers and Jerry Orbach) a talking clock and candelabrum listen as Maurice pleads for shelter and Lumiere offers him a place to stay, over Cogsworth’s objections. You know, the way the scene is presented we’re supposed to think of Cogsworth as being a joyless spoilsport, but he’s actually the only one acting in Maurice’s best interest here. Why do none of the other characters realise that by inviting Maurice in, lighting a fire and plonking him in the Beast’s chair of all places, they’re putting his life at risk? Maybe they’re just so happy to have someone to serve that they don’t care. We’re introduced to Mrs Potts, a talking teapot voiced by Angela Lansbury, and her son Chip, a teacup voiced by Bradley Pierce. This movie has one of the largest casts of supporting characters in the canon and, again, I think this is one area where the movie comes up short against Little Mermaid. The character designs are certainly very inventive, but I can’t help but find Lumiere and Cogsworth a little one dimensional. One’s French and debonair and is constantly womanising, one’s British and stuffy and fussy. Not exactly ground breaking stuff, is what I’m saying.
What is ground-breaking however, is the Beast, whose arrival causes the fire itself to die from fear.
Ah, there’s that good old timey Disney terror.
Beast is animated by (who else?) Glen Keane and just…damn. There were a ton of potential designs floated for the Beast but Keane’s final version, a hulking lion/bison/canine hybrid is spectacular. Couple this with the fantastic, gravelly voicework of Robby Benson (this guy would have made a great animated Batman) and a surprisingly deep and layered character arc and you have one of the all time great Disney leads. There’s actually two Beasts, Scary Motherfucker Beast, and Adorkable Beast. This…this is the former.
The Beast, still mostly wreathed in shadow, terrorises Maurice, demanding to know what’s he’s doing there. Maurice stammers that he was just looking for a place to stay and the Beast snarls “I’ll give you a place to stay!”
Cut to the Beast patting his full stomach and saying contentedly “And I did!”
I kid.
A few…days…later…
Okay, we’ve got to get this out of the way. Trying to figure out the timescales in this movie, like how long it takes to get from Belle’s village to the Beast’s castle, or how long Belle was actually in the castle, or how long Maurice spent in the woods looking to get back to the castle…you’ll go nuts. Seriously. It makes no sense. The next scene where Gaston tries to get Belle to marry him seems to take place in summer at the latest (we see flowers), a few minutes later all the leaves are red and it looks like autumn and a few scenes later it’s winter even though only a few days should have passed…the internal chronology makes pretty much zero sense.
Wibbly Wobbly Timey Wimey Stuff.
So Gaston has actually gone and had an entire wedding party set up outside Belle’s house without even waiting to ask her if she’ll actually marry him.
Okay, Ariel thinking that Eric did the same thing in the Little Mermaid and being delighted actually pissed me off quite a bit so I will give the movie credit for portraying this as being as creepy and insanely narcissistic as it actually would be. So kudos for that. Surprising everyone but the audience, Belle turns Gaston down flat and we see the first hints of the darker side of Gaston’s personality when he hisses to LeFou “I’ll have Belle for my wife, make no mistake about that!”
I also have to talk about the animation for a second. I know I’m probably in the minority here, but am I the only one who thinks that Beauty and the Beast is a bit of a step down from The Little Mermaid in terms of its animation? I mean, the animation on the main characters is all excellent. But, next time you’re watching really pay close attention to the minor characters in the background. Some of it is actually quite rough. Also the backgrounds aren’t great. In fact, compared to Rescuers Down Under, they can seem downright ugly.
Anyway, after Gaston’s gone, Belle sings a reprise of um…Belle, where it becomes pretty much the archetypal “I want” song. Howard Ashman described an “I want” song as usually the second or third song of the musical where the heroine sits down on something and sings about what she wants, and by the end the audience is rooting for her to get it. Once she’s finished, Philippe arrives alone and Belle asks him what happened to Maurice and for some reason Phillipe doesn’t answer…oh yeah, he’s a FUCKING HORSE.
Belle tells Philippe to take her to Maurice and he brings her to the Beast’s castle (little bit of a continuity gaffe because Philippe was long gone before Maurice actually reached the castle but, fuck it, I’ll let it slide.). Belle gazes at the castle and wonders aloud, “What is this place?”
What? You’ve never seen a completely random forest castle before?
She enters the castle and finds Maurice locked in a dungeon. And I gotta say, I’m disappointed in Maurice. What kind of inventor gets captured and doesn’t immediately start building a robot suit to escape?
Tony Stark built that in a CAVE! With a BOX OF SCRAPS!
Belle tries to break him out but she’s ambushed by the Beast, who knocks the torch out of her hands. Belle pleads with him to let Maurice go, saying that he’s sick and could die. At first, the Beast refuses, but then Belle makes him an offer he can’t turn down. In exchange for letting him go, she’ll take his place. I find this really interesting. It’s Belle, not the Beast who actually suggests the exchange. It may be that Beast was too honourable to make the suggestion, but once she did he simply didn’t have the resolve to throw away his last chance at being human again.
We get probably Belle’s finest moment as a character where she stands in front of the Beast and simply says “You have my word” before collapsing to the ground as he coldly snarls “Done!”
Beast throws Maurice into a creepy spider carriage, and tells it to “take him to the village”. Since Beast doesn’t specify which village, we can only assume the carriage takes Maurice on a tour of every small town and hamlet in Western Europe before finally bringing him home.
Belle is devastated because the Beast didn’t even let her say goodbye, and it’s clear that the Beast does actually feel guilty over it. He then surprises Belle by taking her to her room, as she thought she was going to be staying in the dungeon. The Beast tells her that the castle is now her home and that she can go anywhere except the west wing. Belle asks him what’s in the west wing and he explodes with “IT’S FORBIDDEN!” Please remember this when Beast acts all surprised when he finds Belle there later.
What is your fascination with my forbidden closet of mystery?
The Beast takes Belle to her room, and, on Lumiere’s prompting, politely invites her to dinner demands that she joins him for dinner on pain of death and mauling. Jesus. I really want to see the wedding invites when these two finally get hitched.
Belle collapses on the bed in tears and we cut to the tavern in the village where Gaston is moping like a sulky five year old because Belle turned him down; “Now Gaston, you know can have any other girl in the village.” “But I want THAT one!”
LeFou tries to cheer him up with Gaston, probably my favorite song in the whole movie (yeah, you heard me Be Our Guest, you got a problem with that?). It’s a hilarious romp where the whole town gets to indulge their man crush for the big lug and the more I watch it the more I think Howard Ashman was trying to drop subtle hints about Gaston’s sexuality.
Well. I say “subtle”.
They’re interrupted by Maurice, who busts into the tavern begging them for help and saying that Belle’s been kidnapped by the Beast. Figuring that Maurice has finally gone full on Space Cowboy, the give him the bum’s rush and throw him out. But this causes an idea to wander unexpectedly into the uncharted rainforest of Gaston’s brain…
Meanwhile at the castle, Belle meets Mrs Potts, Chip, and one of my favorite characters in the movie, Madame de la Grande Bouche (voiced by Jo Anne Worley). She’s actually not even named in the movie, that name is from the stage version. I just love how nonchalont she is about the fact that she’s a talking wardrobe. Belle is all “This is impossible!” and she’s just “Yeah, but what you gonna do?” Madame tries to get her dressed for dinner but Belle says she’s not going.
Down in the dining room, Beast paces furiously wondering what’s taking so long. Lumiere asks him if he’s considered that Belle might be the one to break the spell.
What the hell does Lumiere think is going on here? Does he think Beast is going to say “Well shit, I was just going to fatten her up for Christmas dinner but your idea is much better!”
Cogsworth arrives and Beast demands to know where Belle is. Poor Cogsworth is so paralysed with fear that he stares briefly into Bahia itself…
Weird. It’s like he has tiny eyes IN HIS EYES.
…and stammers that she’s not coming. Beast loses his fucking shit and rampages up the stares while Cogsworth runs after him screaming “Please! Your grace! Your eminence!” Watching this scene as a small Catholic boy, it always confused me because I thought it meant that the Beast was a cardinal.
Beast hammers on the door and demands that Belle come down to dinner but she tells him to screw off. On the prompting of the domestics, he tries to be nicer but she still refuses, because…yeah, nice manners do not really excuse kidnapping. One of the lazier criticisms of this movie is that Belle is suffering from Stockholm syndrome, which betrays a misunderstanding both of Stockholm syndrome and the movie itself. Belle doesn’t bond with the Beast as a defence against his threats and intimidation. In fact, she only starts to warm to him once he begins treating her with decency and respect. We’re not there yet, though. Beast tells the servants that if Belle doesn’t eat with him, she doesn’t eat at all. He skulks back to his chambers where he uses his magic mirror to spy on her not creepy at all. He hears Belle tell Madame le Grande Bouche that she doesn’t want anything to do with him, and decides that he’s just fooling himself and that she’ll never see him as anything but a monster.
So…let her go? Just a thought.
Mrs Potts is putting Chip and his brothers and sisters to sleep…
There are so many troubling implications from this that I’ll get into later.
…when she looks up to see that Belle has come down to the kitchen. Belle mentions that she’s hungry, and Mrs Potts orders everyone to fix her up with a full course meal. Cogsworth, again the only one who apparently remembers that they work for a psychotic hell-monster, isn’t happy with this but they all steamroll over him and put on Be Our Guest, the movie’s big show stopper.
Damn, what is there even left to say about this one? I’m going to go out on a limb and say it’s the most famous song from the movie. It was nominated for an Oscar for best song, but lost to Beauty and the Beast.
But it did get a Simpsons homage, which is like the Oscars of life.
And on a technical level it’s superb, just an imaculately crafted musical setpiece. And yet…yeah, I can’t really put my hand on my heart and say I love this song. It’s just so polished and so meticulously crafted that I can’t really respond to it on an emotional level. If it sounds like I’m dissing the song for being too good then maybe I am, but I just feel like it’s missing the sense of lightness and spontaneity that you get in something like Under the Sea. I dunno. I shall accept my punishment in the comments.
Miraculously, Beast does not hear the fullscale Broadway musical number being performed in his dining room (in my head he’s just up in his room listening to Simple Plan with the volume turned up).
“How could this happen to meeee?”
Belle asks if she can have a tour of the castle and Cogsworth and Lumiere agree to show her around. She gives them the slip and then makes the spectacularly stupid decision to go snooping around the West Wing.
“Hi, Beast? Some weird chick’s wandering around up here, can you escort her out? Thanks buddy.”
She wanders through the Beast’s bedroom, past all the smashed furniture (no wonder all the servants are afraid of him, he’s killed like half of them) and she sees the portrait that the Beast had painted when he was ten showing what he’d look like when he was twenty.
She then sees his magic floating rose, and is just about to touch it when the Beast sees her. He’s absolutely furious, and with good reason for once, but he overreacts completely, smashing tables and chairs and roaring “GET OUT!”
Belle frantically tells the servants; “Promise or not, Imma get the fuck outta here!” (her exact words) , and she flees the castle on Philippe. She doesn’t get very far however, because this is the only forest in the world that has more wolves than trees. The wolves trap her and Philippe and are about to move in for the kill but the Beast arrives just in time to be a Big Damn Hero.
This fight scene. Jesus Aloysious Christ, this fight scene! If the sight of Beast kicking the ass of an entire wolf pack doesn’t get your blood pumping then chances are you are dead, in which case…stop reading this and return to the peace of the grave. For shame! It is ungodly for the dead to browse the internet.
Beast sees them off but is badly wounded and collapses in the snow. And here’s something that I find very satisfying, Belle’s first instinct is to fucking leave him there to die. She doesn’t, of course. But she definitely considers it before her conscience forces her to save his life. Yeah, Stockholm syndrome my ass.
Back at the castle, Belle tends Beast’s wounds, and after some arguing she thanks him for saving her life. The Beast says she’s welcome and that’s pretty much the last we see of Scary Motherfucker Beast. He doesn’t even raise his voice to anyone else for the rest of the movie, barring a few roars at Gaston.
Back at the village, Gaston and LeFou meet with Monsieur D’Arque, the asylum keeper voiced by the great Tony Jay. Gaston tells D’Arque that he wants him to lock up Maurice in his asylum, so that Gaston can blackmail Belle into marrying him. D’Arque says that that’s despicable, but since he’s pure evil he is totally on board. Jay’s purring, deliciously malevolent delivery just steals this scene, and it’s no wonder that they asked him back a few years later to voice Frollo.
At the castle, Beast is falling for Belle, and wants to do something nice for her. At Lumiere’s suggestion he brings her to a room in the castle, tells her to close her eyes and when she opens them he shows her his gift. And I have to admit, it’s pretty spectacular.
An almost complete collection of the works of Stephen King!
This scene segues into Something There, where Beast and Belle sing about their deepening relationship while Belle shows Beast how to feed the birds (tuppence a bag).
You’ve heard of the bluebird of happiness?
This is the bluebird of not-giving-a-fuck.
Belle then throws a snowball at Beast and the servants sing about how everything seems to be going well, while behind them through the window Belle and Beast have a friendly snowball fight. At least, we hope it’s friendly.
“GRAAAAAHHH! KILL YOU!!”
After this is Human Again, which I’d never seen before watching the movie again for the blog. Human Again was originally written for the film but cut for time but was added to the stage musical version. When the time came for the film to be released on DVD, it was decided to animate the song and insert it into the movie. The result is…fine. It’s probably the weakest song in the film but that’s hardly the same as saying it’s bad. The new animation gels with the old seamlessly enough. It’s certainly not a travesty like the extra scenes they shoe-horned into Bedknobs and Broomsticks (also starring Angela Lansbury, weirdly enough). It’s fine, I’m just having a little bit of difficulty seeing why someone thought it was absolutely vital that this sequence be re-inserted into the movie oh wait a minute…
Yeah, that explains it.
You really thought you could release a movie under my name without magic brooms?
Please! I’m sorry! We didn’t know that was a thing!
Tell me Jeff, you ever been to Bahia?
No! Not that! Look, I’ll make this right! In the special edition we’ll have more magic brooms than you’ve ever seen!
…
Brooms?
Yes! I swear! Just please don’t drop me off this balcony!
BROOOOOOMS!
Needs more brooms.
The song finishes with Belle reading aloud to Beast: “For never was there a story of more woe, than this of Juliet and her Romeo”. This pisses me off for two reasons. Firstly, if you think Romeo and Juliet is some wonderfully romantic love story then you clearly have NOT READ THE PLAY.
Wasn’t it so romantic when she stabbed herself in the chest?
Secondly…how exactly do you read someone an entire play? Was Belle doing voices for the different characters? Was she speaking the character identifiers: ” Benvolio. In love? Romeo. Out. Benvolio. Of love?” Because that would get old really fast. Plus, it’s a looooong play. And when she’s done, Beast asks him to read it to her again, like it’s the Three Little Pigs or something.
Well anyway, one thing I will say for Human Again, it gives Madame de la Grande Bouche more stuff to do, which I am always in favour of. And it does segue seamlessly back into the original movie with her leaping into a fountain which throws up a load of water which brings us into the scene where Beast is getting bathed and made over before his big date with Belle.
C’mon guys. He’s an eighteenth century French aristocrat. That look is waaaay too macho.
Then we get the famous ballroom scene over the Oscar winning song, Tale as Old as Time.
Am I just dead inside? Is that it? Is that why I just can’t connect to this on an emotional level? It’s all so beautifully done. I mean, sure the CGI hasn’t aged particularly well but it still looks pretty. But I just…can’t…get in on this. For a love scene to work for me there has to be a certain emotional rawness that just doesn’t come through here. It’s so safe and nice, which I realise is a weird critique to be levelling at a Disney movie but there ya go.
After dancing, they go outside to the balcony where it’s conveniently stopped being winter, and Beast asks Belle if she’s happy. She says she is, but then looks away into the distance and he asks “What is it?”
Oh gee, Beast. I wonder what could it possibly be? Maybe if we stay here all night and wrack our brains we can crack this mystery together?
No need, as it happens. Belle tells him she wishes that she could see her father again one last time, and he lets her use the magic mirror (presumably after deleting the browser history first). She sees Maurice, lost and freezing in the forest, where, since we see him leaving to rescue Belle immediately after getting thrown out of the tavern, he’s presumably been the entire length of their courtship. And if you ever find yourself in a North Korean prison camp and are forced to watch the two direct to video sequels to this thing, keep in mind that during the entire course of those two movies, Maurice is slowly dying in the snow.
Belle realises that at this rate he’ll be dead by next June and Beast, although it breaks his heart, releases her from her vow and tells her to go to him. Belle, of course, being stricken with Stockholm Syndrome refuses to stay…no, my mistake she gets on that horse and high tails it out of there as fast as she can while Beast roars his grief to the heavens.
“YOU AH TEARING ME APART BELLE!”
Belle finds Maurice and brings him home. She nurses him back to health and Maurice asks her how she was able to escape. She tells him that Beast let her go, and that he’s “changed somehow”.
“Like his character design had been subtly altered to make him seem more appealing.”
Chip reveals that he stowed away in Belle’s bag and asks her why she left, but before she can answer him there’s a knock on the door. Belle answers it only to find herself face to face with Monsieur D’Arque who tells her that he’s come for her father.
“Excellent”
They drag Maurice off and Gaston makes his offer to Belle; he’ll get Maurice set free if she marries him. Belle doesn’t even give it a moment’s consideration and instead uses the magic mirror to show the mob the Beast and prove that he’s not crazy. Seeing that the Beast is real, the mob panics and someone asks if he’s dangerous. Belle replies “He wouldn’t hurt anyone! Please, I know he looks vicious but he’s really kind and gentle. He’s my friend.”
See? NOW it’s Stockholm Syndrome.
Gaston realises that Belle is in love with the Beast, and he tells the mob that the only way to ensure the village’s safety is to kill the Beast. After all, the castle is a few mere hours weeks days away it’s like RIGHT NEXT DOOR. The townspeople are instantly convinced, save for one brave haystack.
“Guys, let’s be rational here. Now, this Beast hasn’t hurt anyone that we know of so maybe we should just…”
“Sounds like Beast-Talk to me!”
“JESUS!”
Belle tries to reason with them, but Gaston says “If you’re not with us, you’re against us!”
Hmmm…this is all strangely familiar.
They lock Belle and Maurice in the basement and head off to the strains of Kill the Beast, my second favourite song of the movie. Gaston tells the mob to “Screw your courage to the sticking place”. So, he’s gone from complaining about reading books with no pictures to quoting Shakespeare? Must have taken an e-learning course.
Chip uses the automatic chopping machine to break them out of the basement and Belle rides off to warn the Beast.
The mob arrives at the castle…
…and Mrs Potts runs to tell the Beast that the castle is under attack and that a big ten foot tall hell-beast would be real useful right about now. But Beast has sunk into full on emo mode and tells them to just let the attackers come.
“Well…okay. But could you at least go outside to meet them so we don’t all have to die as well?”
“No. Too sad.”
Gaston’s mob gets into the castle easily enough, but they quickly get embroiled in a savage battle against the ambush tactics of the castle inhabitants and holy shit I was joking before but the Iraq war parallels just fit this thing like a fucking glove! I’m going to write a PhD on this:“How Can You Read This? It Has No Pictures.”; Gaston as critique of Neoconservative policy and the Bush doctrine.
Anyway, the battle between the castle inhabitants and the villagers is actually pretty brutal and contains such highlights as Mrs Potts scalding people with piping hot tea and Madame De Grand Bouche straight up murdering a dude.
Crushed his head like a fucking nut.
And it doesn’t end there. We get Lumiere almost getting melted like a Nazi standing in front of the Ark of the Covenant by LeFou, Le Fou getting stabbed in the ass by Cogsworth (not a euphemism) and OH JESUS!
So…help me out here Disney, is what I’m watching rape or disembowelment?
They manage to drive the invaders out, but Gaston has made it to the Beast’s bedroom.
“Hey Beast? You ever dance with the Red Rooster in the pale moonlight?”
“Go ahead. I couldn’t feel any more pain than I already do!”
“FUCK I HAVE NEVER BEEN MORE WRONG ABOUT ANYTHING IN MY LIFE!”
Gaston shoots Beast and knocks him through the window and onto the roof. Beast can’t even muster enough strength to fight back, and Gaston breaks off a gargoyle and makes to finish him off. But Belle arrives and calls out to him to stop.
And suddenly, Beast has a reason to live…
Time’s up. Rules change.
I’ve got to admit, it is such a “Fuck yeah!” moment when Beast remembers that he’s the goddamn Beast and starts taking Gaston apart. Now that Beast has got his head in the game, Gaston doesn’t have a chance and the fight ends with him being held by his neck over a five hundred foot drop while he begs the Beast “Let me go! Please!”
Very poor choice of words.
But instead of dropping him, Beast simply pulls Gaston in and in a voice deeper than the pits of hell says two words:
“Get out”.
And my balls have just grown balls watching that.
Belle appears on the balcony and they have their reunion but Gaston, being a bastard, stabs Beast in the back before being thrown into the ravine.
“LAZY BASTARD KOOKABURRAS!”
Belle pulls Beast onto the balcony and he tells her that he’s glad that he got to see her one last time. He dies, and Belle tearfully whispers to him that she loves him just in time for the last rose petal to fall.
As the music swells (the score in this scene is achingly good), beams of light start to rain from the sky and as Belle watches in amazement, the dead Beast is transformed into a living, human prince.
I sense a great disturbance in the force, as if a million furries cried out in anguish…and were silenced.
Yeah, I’m not the first one to say this, and I sure as hell amn’t going to be the last, but this ending is really unsatisfying to me. I don’t know anyone who prefers the prince to Beast, and it’s such a let down to know that the awesome, bad-ass teddy bear we’ve grown to love over the course of the movie is gone forever, replaced by some bland, blue-eyed pretty boy. I mean, I know Belle marries him. But when they’re in bed together, she’ll be thinking about Beast. Don’t tell me she won’t be. But we’ve still got the other unfortunate thing about the ending to talk about; Mass Character Death!
Belle and the Prince kiss, breaking the spell and transforming the household staff back into human form. But see, here’s the thing. Only some of the magic household objects used to be people. We see them at the end:
There’s what, maybe two hundred people there, tops? What about all the little talking forks, the walking tables, the dancing combs and living suits of armour? I got news for you; THEY’RE ALL DEAD NOW. At the end we see Mrs Potts and Chip. Know who we don’t see?
Yeah. Happily ever after my ass! This thing has a higher body count than Rambo 3!
Well anyway, a reprise of Beauty and the Beast plays and they watch the recycled animation from Sleeping Beauty. The end.
***
In 1991, a movie made history when it won the Academy Award for Best Picture. It was the first film of its genre to win that award, a tale of the strange attraction that forms between a beautiful young woman and a mysterious monster.
Sometimes they come in twos. Like asteroid movies, or CGI comedies about ants.
In one respect it’s not surprising that Beauty and the Beast lost to Silence. Animated movies continue to be stigmatised by the Academy. There have only been two animated movies since Beauty to be nominated for Best Picture (Toy Story 3 and Up). Instead, animated films have been ghettoised into the “Best Animated Feature” category, in a field so small that it ensures that pretty much every major animation studio can get nominated every year.
Shark Tale is an Oscar Nominated film. You just think about that.
But in another sense it is surprising to me that Silence won. Silence of the Lambs is a dark, troubling, morally complex film whereas Beauty and the Beast feels like it was made to win Oscars. Now, I know that’s not the case. There was absolutely no way of knowing that this film would ever be considered for an Academy Award. But it feels like that, to me at least. There’s something calculated about it that just stops me from truly appreciating it’s merits. And, make no mistake, those merits are there. As I said before, it’s in many ways a fantastic film. But there’s something there that stops me loving it. So, it looks like you’re going to have the Unshaved Mouse around for a long time to come. Sorry Walt, I can respect and admire it, but I still don’t like it.
Oh well. At least you tried. I suppose you’ve suffered enough.
You…you don’t mean?
Sure, I’ll turn you back into a human. You ready?
SERIOUSLY!? OH MY GOD, YES PLEASE!
Okay, close your eyes…Triguna Mekoides Ave Panchito Pistoles!
Oohh…tingly. Goodbye everyone!
Goodbye Mouse, we’ll miss you!
Peace out, dawg.
Do svidaniya, tovarich.
So long buddy.
There…the spell is complete. The Unshaved Mouse is gone… he is now A PRINCE!
…
…
…
…
Um…you know what? It’s fine. Change me back.
Scoring
Animation: 15/20
The production had less time to complete the film after they had to scrap the first six months and start again. So we get a pretty noticeable downgrade in animation from Rescuers Down Under.
The Leads: 18/20
Beast is awesome. Belle…is also awesome. Fair is fair.
The Villains: 16/20
Gaston is an interesting and effective departure from the usual villain template.
Supporting Characters: 15/20
I know everyone loves them, but I’m putting my foot down. They’re good, not great.
The Music: 17/20
Technically fantastic, but just lacking that little extra spark that made Little Mermaid’s songs so good.
FINAL SCORE: 81%
NEXT TIME: Get ready for unbelievable sights and indescribable feelings! Like the feeling you get when you pull on your shoes only to realise that your cat left a present for you in them and now it’s all mushed up between your toes. I don’t know how you’d describe that. The point is, Aladdin is next!
Neil Sharpson AKA The Unshaved Mouse, is a playwright, comic book writer and blogger living in Dublin. The blog updates every second Thursday. Thanks for reading!
unshavedmouse 
Your review makes no sense. You keep going on about how awesome it is but you say you don’t like it.
I can appreciate it as a great film. I just don’t like it on an emotional level aside of a few scenes (usually when Beast is hitting stuff.)
I can concur with unshavedmouse here. I think Little Mermaid is a groundbreaking, fantastic film, but I don’t “love” it like I love Beauty and the Beast, which I’m more drawn toward. I also feel that way about Orson Welles’ films; I can admit most of them are fabulous, but I don’t enjoy or connect to them on a personal level.
Figure now’s as good a time as any to jump in and comment. First, thanks for this blog Mouse, you’re doing great work here. Always a highlight of my week reading your posts. Only downside is you post the same week as the Nostalgia Critic so I have a whole week of deadspace in between your review and the next Nostalgia Critic review. Oh well, at least he’s back.
Anyway, on to this movie. This is my favorite in the Disney canon. I’d say it’s far and away the best but that would be slighting The Little Mermaid, Hunchback, and a few others. This movie sits at number 17 on my list of favorite films (Little Mermaid is at 32, as an almost 20 year old man, I have no shame in saying that). And while I love this movie, I have to admit that I completely see your point as to why you don’t love it. Yes there are several discrepancies with the flow of time in this movie, yes there are issues with the number of servants in the castle turning into animate objects (a problem which Human Again just makes worse), and yes there is the matter of how does no one know about this castle if the beast was originally a prince. But honestly, those are just kind of the things that I tend to brush aside when watching a Disney movie. This is far from the only Disney film to have continuity or world consistency problems but this is a universe with enchantresses after all. I’m willing to overlook most of those things even if there is no logical explanation, because everything that this movie needs to get right for it to work, it gets RIGHT. Belle is the perfect lead (yes I see your point that she’s too perfect but I never saw her that way, the scene you pointed out where she almost leaves Beast to die is a good example of that), Beast is just beautifully animated and is an excellent male lead, and Gaston is one of my favorite Disney villains because of how different he is and because you actually see his descent into villainy. The other Disney villains are just kind of evil when the movie starts but Gaston starts out good. A jerk, yes, but good. I love the music (there are some truly brilliant musical motifs in this movie if you listen closely, such as when Belle sings at the fountain in the opening and then later on in Something There), the supporting characters are (in my opinion anyway) colorful and fun, and while the animation isn’t top to bottom fantastic, there are moments that take my breath away every time, like the opening shot of the film and the design of the castle. So while I know it’s not a film without flaws, I love it anyway.
In regards to the Oscars, I definitely think this should have won over Silence of the Lambs. While Silence is an effective psychological horror film that has definitely become iconic, I just don’t think it’s all that spectacular outside of Anthony Hopkins as Hannibal Lecter. The other characters are fairly strong and well acted but none truly rise to the level of Hopkins and it weakens the movie for me. So for my money, BATB should have won that year, just as Up should have won in 2009 (well maybe Inglourious Basterds over it). I think it’s only a matter of time before an animated film wins Best Picture and my money is definitely on Pixar to do it. I would say Miyazaki but if Spirited Away couldn’t do it, then nothing will (and to show how biased I am, Spirited Away and Up sit at number 2 and 3 respectively on my list). I sure hope it happens soon because I love animation and I really want it to get the respect it deserves, I’m sick of having to defend it as being more than just kid’s fare.
So in conclusion: great work, I can see your point about why you don’t love this movie, and I look forward to reading the rest of your reviews. Keep up the great work mouse!
In my defense, he was still weekly when I switched to bi-weekly (or maybe he’d quit by then, I forget). Inglourious Basterds is one of my favorite movies and Up is only around middle way on my list of Pixars so I wasn’t too cut up about that. This review was tough because as I think is pretty clear I don’t really have good reasons for not liking it. I just don’t. Thanks for reading.
I believe he had quit when you went to bi-weekly. You switched around January, right? He quit in September or so and came back in February. Regardless, don’t blame you for it at all, I’m just glad you’re still able to write these things.
Yeah, I went bi at the start of the year…..wait.
Hurray! I can finally get “Part of Your World” out of my head and in its place is . . . “A Whole New World.” Pre-emptively, apparently. Oh, Brain. Why must you be so annoying?
Ahem. I will not bash you for not liking this movie for no real reason, because you admit that you’re not sure why you don’t like it. That’s ok. It just happens sometimes.
And you do have some good points — the mixed up seasons (although I always figured that it was permanently winter in the woods around the castle because of MAGIC SPELL (TM) regardless of what season it was in the rest of the world), and how Belle is just too darn perfect (to my adult sensibilities anyway; when this movie first came out I identified with her to an embarrassing degree). And “Be Our Guest” was never my favorite song either — I prefer “Kill The Beast” for lyrics that are fun to belt out or the instrumental “The Transformation.”
I will argue with you a tiny bit about the supporting character of Cogsworth. Yes, he’s the uptight sidekick with the English accent stereotype, but there’s a quote from him that just gets me every time, when he’s offering the Beast suggestions on a gift to give Belle: “there’s the usual . . . flowers, chocolate, promises you don’t intend to keep . . . ” Oh, Cogsworth. You’re not nearly as proper as you’d like us to think, are you? 😉
Great review as always. 🙂 Beauty and the Beast is actually my favorite of the animated Disney films (though not my favorite Disney movie overall), but I’m always up for hearing different viewpoints.
“Okay, help me out here. What was the Beast the prince of?”
Useless history trivia time: back around the time that Beauty and the Beast was set, it was somewhat common for royal families to send troubled and unruly middle children off to live in foreign countries for “cultural enrichment” (a.k.a. to get them as far away from the throne as possible in case they contested the first born’s rule). I’m assuming that the Beast/Prince Adam isn’t actually a French prince, but an unwanted second child from some far off Kingdom sent to live in the middle of nowhere due to his selfish nature. Kind of adds a layer of tragedy to the character and his situation since as a child his family clearly didn’t think enough of him to want to keep him around (or for that matter even bothered to check up on him in his at least ten years of exile).
Wow, that is really interesting. I’ve never heard of that happening!
Okay, that makes sense. Objection withdrawn.
I was going to go for him being the ruler of Belle’s village and a few others around it and everyone forgot about him within a few years but this theory is much better
Sounds like a better idea than turning them into a throw rug and regularly taking ’em out and beating ’em at any rate.
Well about the fact that the scene where everybody is human is just a collection of servants watching their master dance with the missus.
What if everyone else is busy taking care of the castle or just their own business. That’s a stronger possibility then disney writing in a mass character death implication.
Pah! You’re just clutching at straws!
“One of the lazier criticisms of this movie is that Belle is suffering from Stockholm syndrome, which betrays a misunderstanding both of Stockholm syndrome and the movie itself. Belle doesn’t bond with the Beast as a defence against his threats and intimidation.”
Thaaaaaaaaaank youuuuuuuuuuuuuu. I’ve yet to see a serious reviewer of the movie actually come out and say it.
“YOU AH TEARING ME APART BELLE,” Congratulations, you have just one seven different-flavored internets. Would you like them in a bag or as they are?
I do notice that Paige O’Hara is much more trembly in singing voice, almost like a throwback to Snow White. I think the characterization that the vibrato gives her would suit the stage version better, where you see in “No Matter What” and “Home” that no, Belle really ISN’T as self-assured as she comes off. Here it’s just something that’s under the surface…Belle’s moments of weakness are just that, moments, rather than something you notice bubbling under the surface.
And yeah, fuck Adam. Nobody likes Adam better than Beast. Nobody.
I had a dream once where Beast’s parents, the king and queen, had another son who they suspected was making attempts on Beast’s life to assure his own assent to the throne, so they sent Beast to live in obscurity in an unknown castle to keep him safe. It would explain why Beast doesn’t seem to actually rule anything and the villagers are unaware that he exists/don’t notice his absence, so that dream is now head canon for me.
I’ve been waiting around half a year to do the Room joke. The foreign prince theory makes a lot of sense.
Inspired by NC, no doubt? BTW, since BATB is my favorite Disney film, I was somewhat disheartened on your opinion on this. I think the animation in “Beauty” is slightly better than “Mermaid’s” because it seemed a little more polished.
Look at the background characters in the crowd scenes.
Love the review as always!
This, like so many of the previous commenters have averred, is my favorite Disney Canon film as well! And I can forgive you for not liking it!
My family is from Guyana (British Guiana), and your map of France and its territories show the country Guyane aka French Guiana. Although it’s not the same, it’s the closest that my country would ever get mentioned on a blog (unless someone’s talking about the Jonestown Massacre), so thanks, lol!
Okay, that does it. I am making a concerted effort to mention Guyana in every post from now on because that shit ain’t right.
Great! Not sure how you’re gonna do that, but thanks anyway!
Maybe it’s a stop on the road to Bahia? That actually might explain quite a bit…
Yeah, this is my girlfriend’s favorite movie in the Disney Cannon. Though I will admit, while I do admire it, it’s not one in my top five. Though I honestly do admire the score for this. And, if nothing else, I believe we all should remember the hard work, and dedication, that Mr. Ashman put into right as he was passing away.
I figured now would be a good time to show it, but I don’t know if you’ve ever heard of this before: a website dedicated to Howard, created by his sister to share fond memories of him, and a forum where fans can share and talk about him and his works (I should know, I’m a member. And having her respond to a few of my comments, it’s been an amazing thing for me).
http://www.howardashman.com/
Cool. I’ll have to check that out. He was quite a guy.
Thank you for putting your foot down concerning the Stockholm Syndrome nonsense…and thank you for trying to be fair about the scores…I think the soundtrack of Beauty and the Beast of better than TLM, because of the outstanding score, but otherwise…
Nevertheless, I’ll try to explain why Beauty and the Beast deserves every bit of attention it got (and I don’t think it was Oscar-begging, at this point the animation studios was just happy that the axe above their head was withdrawn…the Oscar-begging movie came later, is called “Pocahontas” and naturally didn’t work out): In terms of animation, Beauty and the Beast is nearly as important as Snow White and the Seven Dwarves. I know, Rescuers down Under was the first movie which used the CAPS System. But Beauty and the Beast was the first one which freed the camera in animated movies. Beforehand, the angles were very limited…you could move to the left, right or you could cut to a different perspective, but changing the angle in one sweeping motion like they did in the Ball room scene, it was simply not done beforehand. That’s what makes this scene so important, not the emotion or anything like that. Similar great is the camera movement through the bowing candles in the “Be our Guest” scene (one of Disney’s best acid sequences and one of the reason I went to the theatres THREE TIMES to see the movie!)
Thus said, you are right about the animation nevertheless…it’s one of the most frustrating aspect of the movie, in the “big scenes” it’s a sight so see, but in-between it’s sadly very rushed and full of animation snafus (I guess the biggest is that Gaston apparently shots arrows out of his barrel…and I’m totally sure he didn’t just shot Bambi’s mother but his father two and put his antlers in his decoration). I wish that the whole movie were more carefully animated, but that’s what happens when you force the animators to crank out a movie in two years instead of the usual four.
And yes, you’re right about the timeline-issue (though I REFUSE to see Human again as part of the movie..there was a reason it was cut, mainly because it originally was suppose to illustrate the passing of time, but since they couldn’t leave Maurice in the woods any longer it was dropped…I’m forever thankful that I own the special edition on which the movie is on in three versions, so I don’t have to watch the human again crap). Though I don’t think that the “ten years” are correct…I always saw this along the same line of Sebastian promising that Ariel would talk after the kiss in “Kiss the Girl”, just Ashman throwing in some lyrics without even thinking about it. Considering that the picture Belle sees in the West Wing is not of a child, it was certainly not that long (never mind the stupid cheapquels, which only made the confusion worse).
The movie also deserves special credit for its character design…it’s really interesting to see how dangerous and animalistic the Beast is at the start of the movie, and that he become more and more “good-looking” the more he changes. While at the same time Gaston, who originally might be a jerk but not necessarily a villain, becomes more or more beastly the more time he slides into the negative aspects of his personality. I also love how it makes Belle more beautiful than the Bimbettes without giving her the more beautiful features. Instead she gets more “character” and slower movements, which make her look more graceful than the three busty blondes.
Small explanation at the end: I know that in the mind of English people, a “prince” is the “Son of a King”. But that’s not necessarily what is meant with the title, especially not in France. A “Prince” can simply be a high ranking noble, or a minor ruler.
Oh, and I nearly forgot: Not sure when this “once upon a time” is but most likely Versailles wasn’t even a thought back then. Versailles was build by Louis XIV in the late 17th century, because he felt unsafe in the actual royal residence in Paris (the Louvre). He basically hide from his own folk there (didn’t do his predecessor any good, though)
I’ll make you a deal: You forget I got the date Versailles was built wrong, I’ll forget you called me English.
Ah, sorry…I originally wanted to write English speaking people….(honestly, I have actually no idea why the “speaking” isn’t there….)
Well, perhaps this is during the time when Versaille was built…considering that Maurice builds some sort of machine???? Fairy tale time (and place) is so confusing…..
Yeah. Wibbly wobbly timey wimey.
Nothing worse thab calling an Irishman “English”
Murdering puppies maybe. And it would have to be a lot of them.
Excuse me, hit the wrong button. Meant to say that there’s nothing worse than calling an Irishman an Englishman. It’s just…wrong.
I know…I KNOW…..I feel like a troll….
You are not alone my friend. I think that Beauty and the Beast is extremely overrated. For all the reasons you mentioned. This movie has so many plot holes you can drive a truck through them. There is no denying that aesthetically, it was brilliant. But because this is a narrative based story, I can’t ignore those continuity errors. Don’t feel like you’re the only one, I’ve read lots of reviews/articles with people who agree. Hha, and don’t feel bad about it either. I’m the one who has The Three Caballeros in their top 10 Disney list, so I’m the one going to the depths of Disney Hell. XD
I however, do really like Cogsworth and Lumiere. You say that they are one-dimensional. And that is true, I suppose, but I still like them. They’re no Jiminy Cricket or Sebastian, but I still like ’em.
I don’t get the Jiminy Cricket love. I re-watched Pinocchio recently and the two things that bugged me the most were the fact that all the characters seemed like they were floating (they all looked like they were about a quarter of an inch off the ground when they walked, it was really distracting to me) and Jiminy’s voice. I really, really don’t like his voice
The voice…is a bit off putting. No question. But I think he is actually a very funnily written character.
To each their own, but I really like Jiminy. And his VA, Cliff Edwards, who was a very talented entertainer in his own right.
I agree with you 100% Kenzie. I am looking foward to your review on Aladdin and Pocahontas (I think you are going to rip it to shreds), Lion King…eh. Never really cared much for the movie even though it is good. I just do not see how this is the BEST Disney film….
You explained exactly why I think this is the weakest of the “Fearsome Foursome”. It has A LOT of plot holes and inconsistencies (that everybody looks over), but if it was another film with the same issues, they would rip it to shreds. Some people can overlook the issues, but I can not. Even though the characters are great, the backgrounds are fantastic, and the soundtrack (words cannot describe how much I love it), the plot holes contrive and contradict the relationship between Belle and Beast. I do like it, but I like it A LOT less than I did a year ago. This film is no where near close to perfect, and a film has to be consistent to be fantastic, and this film is the exact opposite of consistent. Great review, and your reasoning for not liking it makes sense
What’s this about Pocahontas? Sorry, I was busy sharpening my knives.
Omg, you are too funny. I guess mid-July will be a stressful review for you then.
Stressful? Eviscerating worthy targets is how I relax.
Thank you! And I also am looking forward to the Pocahontas review. It seems like it has it’s fans and it’s dissenters, so I’m interested to hear his opinions on it. (Personally, it’s one of my least favorite Disney films, although it has one of my favorite soundtracks). The Lion King is my favorite Renaissance film, so that one I’m also interested to read.
I hear ya, Mouse. I like this movie, but I don’t love it. There’s some sort of energy that it’s missing, and I do think it’s partly because Belle is so perfect. Also the side characters are pretty meh, in my opinion. (Although the Gaston song is fantastic – the energy is so high in that scene.)
And yeah – what’s up with the furniture people? Are the living ones somehow not aware that an elbow bump could bring them to their deaths? Does Chip’s chip equate to permanent disability or brain damage or something?
Cut to Val Kilmer: “It just raises too many questions.”
Due to your little teaser at the end, I must admit that I am a little nervous about your Aladdin review. Just a little. I say that because while I immensely enjoy reading your reviews, Aladdin is my second favorite Disney movie. Of course, I always respect your opinion, and you present it in a way that is fair and reasonable, with hilarity being icing on the cake.
The Lion King is what I am looking forward to most since it’s my top favorite Disney movie, and from what I’ve seen you do have a positive opinion on that. It will be such a relief to finally get the fair review it has desperately needed after first watching that god-awful negative review of it by Confused Matthew, and Doug’s Disneycember review that was SOMEWHAT better but still did not do it justice (he really let me down on that one).
Hmmm. Looking back I realise that may give the impression that I don’t like Aladdin. Not the case, I promise you.
Ok, good. (Sigh of relief)
Btw, did you ever watch Confused Matthew’s review of The Lion King? If you haven’t, it’s something that will really infuriate you (it certainly did me). That, or just make you fall to the floor with laughter at how stupid and irrational every single one of his points are against the movie. Many people have responded to him, but I’d be curious at how you would do it, like you just did with Taran. Maybe as its own blog post…though I really want to see you review The Lion King on its own, not as a response to what other people have said about it.
Here’s the link where he reviews it…maybe you could use him as another arch-nemesis towards the end of your Lion King review, as someone who objects to everything you say. (He also gave a positive review of Beauty and the Beast as his favorite Disney movie)
http://www.confusedmatthew.com/The-Lion-King.php
I’ve heard of it, and I’m sure it would annoy the hell out of me but from what I understand that’s his schtick. I actually don’t like picking fights with people on the internet. Taran was a special exception.
Ah…damn….because THAT’s the beloved movie I have a lot of issues with…I never bought into the Aladdin love…I get why people like it, but it is sooooo overrated.
I’m going to tell you right now, Aladdin is a serious contender.for top spot.
Will you rewatch Aladdin for the review? Because this movie really didn’t age well at all. (it’s one of my main issues with it, that it’s less time-less than most of the other Disney movies (Hercules is worse, though) – the other is that the whole movie hinges on the idea that every single person in it is stupid and face-blind)
Not everyone, just Jasmine. I always rewatch the movies at least twice before I rewatch them, once all the way through and then in stops and starts, writing as I go.
Aladdin does have it’s issues, bt not as much as this movie. I do have to admit that it is not going to age that well in 30 years though. Swanpride, you already know how I feel about those two movies so that’s alright. Everyone ignores the issues with this film and pretends that it is not a big deal, but it kind of is, but if it was in another film, everyone would bitch and complain about it. This film is still good though, just not perfect and “Disney’s Best Film”. Double standard
Not just Jasmine, Jafar too…the only reason he recognizes Aladdin eventually is because he notices the lamp in Aladdin’s possession.
I’d forgotten that.
Well, when you rewatch the movie, pay attention how many of Jafar’s plans are actually thought of by his parrot…and take a shot every time he imitates Maleficent. And everytime Jasmine believes something someone half-smart should realize that it can’t be correct. Ah…better not, that might cause alcohol poisoning.
Pshaw! I’m Irish.
Suit yourself…it was only a suggestion…
Loving the Review this week! I’m a long time lurker first time poster…..and that made me sound really creepy…moving on, I think with this film in particular a lot comes down to personal opinions and a little (or large) dose of nostalgia. This is my favourite Disney film of all time ( discounting Pixar studios which has a list of it’s own.) But I can see the flaws and enjoy pointing them out, which meant a night in with other History undergrads trying to pinpoint the date this movie was set in and the timeline continuity; Fun times. So why then is it still my favourite film? I think it’s mostly because it was the first feature length film, never mind a Disney film, I remember watching and I loved it. I re-watched it till the VHS ran out and then bought the DVD. I adored Belle (I still do really) and loved the Beast and so despite all it’s technical flaws and wibbly wobbly timey wimey stuff that i would rip other movies apart for, Beauty and the Beast remained a favourite. It’s a little bit of nostalgia and a link to my childhood but I can understand why you didn’t connect with it as I’m the same way with Aladdin. -Cowers behind my laptop – It’s a good film with catchy songs but I just don’t particularly enjoy it as a movie. In short, loved your review and I can’t wait for the next one and definitely can’t wait for Pocahontas. You can run film but you can never hide from a disgruntled History Graduate. mwhuhahhaha.
And a big hearty welcome to you. Always glad to see a lurker become a poster (it’s like watching a butterfly emerge from a chrysalis, or a lion becoming the grass). I think there’s always been a split between people who like Aladdin and people who like Beauty and the Beast. I think it comes down to whether you prefer your Disney weighty and epic or more light hearted and nimble. I gotta confess, I tend to favour Disney movies that don’t take themselves too seriously (Jungle Book, Emperors New Groove and even Robin Hood are very high on my list of personal favorites). Pocahontas and I…we have beef. And it will not be pretty.
PS: Your evil laugh is excellent. You could learn from her, Swanpride.
Thank you! It has taken many diabolical plans to work out that laugh to satisfaction. Emperor’s New Groove still cracks me up, that’s a movie where the comedy hits nearly every time which is quite a feat in animated movies and their abundance of Puns – shudders. Oddly enough, and quite an outlier for most Disney films, Pocahontas 2 was more accurate than the original, not by much but well movies and historical/cultural/racial accuracy have never been that close. Which sometimes works for plot narrative and can be overlooked because what has been changed works. Other times….well other times just makes me want to smack directors over the head with a very large book and go “There you see this book? This one I’ve just caused massive internal brain hemorrhaging with? THIS is how to get your facts right! Read it! Read it and hang your head in shame.”
Since this is my first post, I feel the need to start with the obligatory “Gongrats this blog is so great & insightful” introduction. Seriously though, I stumbled upon these a few months ago on TGWTG with your “Black Cauldron” review, and not only the writing but the layout is fantastic. To me, this format is a near-perfect translation to the web series on TGWTG, I really believe these could transition into video format with little to no effort, though you probably stick to the blog due to time limitations, and I’m completely fine with that.
But concerning this movie. I was born & raised in the 90’s, which meant there was one royal shitload of VHS tapes around the house. Yet in spite of this, “Beauty & The Beast” and “Hunchback of Notre Dame” were the only Renaissance-era films I never owned nor watched as a child, which coincidentally were both made by the same animation team & was probably the reason Tony Jay made it into the cast amidst several unnecessary celebrities (Other than, you know, his monster of a talent). I later came across both films in young adulthood; Hunchback I loved almost immediately, but “Beauty & The Beast”…I totally agree with you, I can artistically appreciate the time & effort it took to make something like this, but I just can’t muster the gumption to emotionally appreciate it. Perhaps it was just because I didn’t grow up with it, and Hunchback’s moodiness fit better in my oh-so cynical disposition I’ve had lately?
But I always try to be the optimistic film buff, or at least an understanding one. Other than the unapologetic cash-in flicks, I try to understand what the filmmakers were trying to go for, even if they fail brutally (*cough The Room*). I think you hit the nail on the head in saying it just “felt” like it was made to win an Oscar. I highly doubt it was the goal to win a gold boy, let alone be nominated for one, but to make a film that, in the face of the commercial failure of “Rescuers Down Under” & the mid-production re-write, perhaps the intention was to make the Disney version of Oscar bait, a film that was so well polished that most people would love it. And that’s where I feel it falls short: It just feels neat & polished, well-revered and kept in a glass display case, so much so that there isn’t any emotional resonance anymore. Unlike the Sugar & Tar films, which were just bleeding with raw energy, there’s just something between me and Beauty that prevents me from connecting with it. I thought it was just because I never watched it as a child, but looking on this page it seems like I’m not alone.
I won’t deny that there are some elements to this film that I genuinely love, but as a whole I admire & respect it as wells as the critical achievements it gave to Disney Studios, though the financial achievement would come along three years later
Oh, and the the person who asked about the Chip’s chip…I don’t know if this counts, but in the journal in Kingdom Hearts II, it says the chip was a “transfer” so to speak of a chip he had in his tooth; and Mouse, I may be misquoting here, but I’m sure the film said Beast was nearing 26, which meant he was a teen when he was transformed…so does that mean Chip was a human child even then and never really aged when he was a tea cup, so he mentally remained as a child? Was everyone like that, just stuck at the age they were when they were turned into household appliances? But then why was the Beast in his proper age as a human, by that logic he should still be a kid & way too young for Belle–AGH! Forget it. I can’t question Disney Logic.
Anyways, I’m really looking forward to your take on “Aladdin” Mouse! Can’t wait!
Hi Scorpio, thanks for the comment and I hope there’s many more to come. I have been seriously considering doing video reviews (the name ‘Unshaved Mouse’ originally came about because I thought that if I ever did a Nostalgia Critic-esque show I’d wear a set of Mickey Mouse ears and I usually have some five o’clock shadow so…yeah, unshaved mouse.) Problem is, it would mean getting a camera, learning how to use the camera, getting editing software, learning how to use said editing software, becoming much more au fait with fair use copyright law and also finding a way to add like thirty hours to the day. So, if it ever happens it’s probably going to be a long time in the future. Hunchback of Notre Dame for me is the mirror image of Beauty and the Beast. Beauty and the Beast is a film I dislike in spite of it’s near perfection as a film, Hunchback is a film I adore in spite of it’s many, many flaws. I’m pretty sure the rose will wilt on his twenty first birthday. I suppose you could argue that Chip remained a child because porcelain doesn’t age, but Beast grew older because living tissue does.
Kingdom Hearts. What a game. No freakin’ idea what was going on, but what a game.
Thanks for clearing that up, Scorpio. Now I can dedicate my pointless overthinking efforts to something way more important, like the internal biology of the cars in ‘Cars’.
You don’t like an animated movie because it’s too WHITE? What kind of minorities were you expecting? So fucking stupid.
I’m going to take a wild stab in the dark here and say “Hi Taran!”. Let me explain. I’m not complaining that every character in this movie set in medieval France is caucasian. That would (indeed) be stupid. I meant white in the stereotypical sense of being strait-laced, buttoned down, rigid and uncool.
I posted the theory that the human vs human dance scene in the end just wasn’t popular with the help. You disagreed, OK fine. Well one day when you’re rich with your own caste and a furry fetish pretty booknerd marries you, and I’m one of your servants. I just won’t show up to your celebratory dance. I”ll be busy, that will show you.
Also do you find The Little Mermaid lacking in the second half especially as the end comes near? Well I find Aladdin to be the opposite. It starts out kinda corny and stupid and picks up by the second half. I kept rolling my eyes at the sand tiger head with laryngitis and the meet cute routine. But as soon as Aladdin gets the lamp it becomes great. Just wondering if it’s my taste or something more general.
What do you mean “one day”?. That already happened. Little Mermaid does lose something for me towards the end mostly because Ariel because progressively more helpless and passive. I don’t really think there’s any appreciable rise or dip in quality with Aladdin. I actually think it’s one of the more consistent renaissance films. Oh, and absolutely LOVE the Cave of Wonders.
Oh, and I was joking about you clutching at straws. Your explanation makes perfect sense.
Loved this review and agree that BatB doesn’t age as gracefully as the enchanting Little Mermaid or retain the same level of fun and wonder post multiple viewings as Aladdin, my favorite Disney film(didn’t you just have a heart attack and die from NOT SURPRISE already?) .
And I totally get your opinion on “Be Our Guest”. The problem with it, especially compared to TLM songs, is that it lacks personality. It’a just a well oiled Broadway showstopper seemingly performed by robots on auto-pilot. Which can be said for the rest of BatB too. Lacks the fun personality of Mermaid and Aladdin and the pathos of Lion King. Easily the weakest of the Big Four, IMO.
See! See! I’m not crazy.
Well, you are, Mouse, just not about this point. 😉 I always thought that this song had a personality though, like when Cogsworth is getting more and more uncomfortable when the “snow” is falling on him, and Lumiere is being silly. But when it crescendoes, the song just goes bonkers. I love it. Not as much as the other songs, but I love it.
Okay…I went to see the play a few times, and during the Human Again scene, Belle was reading him the story of King Arthur, NOT Romeo and Juliet. That makes a whole lot more sense in my opinion. You make a good point about how reading Romeo and Juliet out loud by yourself would get pretty old, but that aside, wouldn’t there be tears in their eyes rather than eagerness coming from the Beast when it was done?
Great review! I’m glad that I’m not the only one who feels this way about Beauty and the Beast. I think it is gorgeous and the music is great. I also really enjoy the starting number and the finale. But I just can’t emotionally get into the heart of it- which is Belle and the Beast’s relationship I suppose. The movie- to me- feels like an incredibly dressed up and frosted pastry with just an “okay” filling… sorry… I’m always thinking about food.
Anyway, I used to think of Stockholm Syndrome when I saw this, but I realize I wasn’t using the right phrase. It’s not so much Belle’s reaction as much as the motivation of the Beast and the furniture. I just always get a little crept out about the circumstances of their falling in love. The scene when they are preparing for her to come down to dinner after she lost her father and they are practicing how to best come on to her always seemed really weird to me. The wardrobe is even offering her cute dresses. I understand that they are desperate to be human again, but it just comes off as insincere.
These moments become much less frequent once the beast starts to come around, but even after the ballroom dance when she says she is worried about her father. He took a WHILE to think about a solution to that as if it were so difficult. Why wouldn’t he let her at least visit him? Or have him brought to the castle?
I’m probably overthinking a Disney film lol But those things always pop up in my mind when I watch this film and it doesn’t seem very genuine. It’s one of the reasons I can’t emotionally connect to it. I wonder if the movie would have been better if the Beast and the furniture had not known the specifics of the curse or if they had discovered them later… I don’t know. But overall, I do like this movie. I just prefer the rest of the Renaissance films over it.
But not Pocahontas right? Right?!
Lol. Right actually. I never think to include Pocahontas in the Renaissance. I always stop at The Lion King by habit. The Fantastic Four I spose. I didn’t really like Pocahontas. I thought it was stiff, calculated and boring. But I did enjoy the score and animation. I’ll have to look at your review for that.
It’s not so much a review as a bloodbath.
I somehow managed to neglect this movie for years, but I watched it again only a week ago. And I was in for a treat, because I really like Belle. Despite what the title of the movie says, and what the villagers say, I don’t find her that beautiful. At least not until she wears that stunning yellow dress, because she looked really good in that. But anyway, I like that she’s not a perfect beauty, but rather the brainy/bookish type, just like Jane in “Tarzan”. Maurice also reminds me a bit of Professor Porter, so I guess it’s no wonder that their daughters are so similar. Gaston also is a rather original Disney villain. He’s not obsessed with power or money, but he’s just a conceited jackass.
I like this movie very much, but I agree about the quickly changing seasons thing. I mean, WTF? As for the prince, I guess he’s not the the “son of a king”, bur rather “merely” a high-ranking aristocrat, just like Swanpride said. After all, the rulers of Monaco, Luxembourg and Lietchenstein are still called princes, and those countries are very tiny. He could also teechnically belong to the French royal house, but a very minor branch.
Holy Ballsack, The beginning of this movie, in the forest with the wolves, and the beast himself, scared the everlasting SHIT Outta me when I was a kid! This movie is just awesome! Easily the best Renaissance movie, and the only one that can compete with the Walt’s first Five (you know the ones).
I think if you included elements such as storytelling, message, and artistic merit in your rubric, this movie would have scored better.
I can actually understand your feelings towards Beauty and the Beast. I too recognize that Beauty and the Beast is probably Disney’s most artistically and technically perfect movie but my feelings towards it lean more towards “respect” than “love the hell out of.” This means that while I definitely admire it the most out of Disney’s movies, I enjoy watching several of Disney’s other movies better like Aladdin and Tangled.
I will be honest with you, I don’t like Tangled.
Well, everyone’s entitled to their own opinion. 🙂 I have noticed that people who don’t like Tangled tend to like The Princess and the Frog, and vice versa.
That’s exactly me!!! TPATF sits at number 8 on my top 10 Disney films list. I liked the music more because it fits more with the tone, like the Nostalgia Critc pointed out when comparing the two films. I also prefer Tiana to Rapunzel because she seems more mature and responsible.
I rewatched TPatF recently and my esteem for it actually went up a lot from my initial “it’s pretty good, but I feel more ‘polite respect’ than ‘love it to bits’ towards it” viewing in 2009; I’d agree that its music is better overall than Tangled’s. I still slightly prefer Tangled, though, because I feel that it handles its romance and emotional moments just a little bit better than TPatF does.
Ah well, I guess we’ll just have to agree to disagree.
Also, as for my “respect more than love” Disney movies, my biggest one is “Snow White.” I respect its artistic achievements, but I don’t think it’s a good movie, overall.
Once again, all ur points hit mine…..
I respect and Luke the film, but I never really have any emotional impact with it like I had with the little mermaid…… I never understood why, but I guess u answered my questions lol.
Also, u hadn’t said how Gaston went to Bahia.. When he fell down the balcony, the animators secretly drew skulls into his eyes, signaling his death….
How the hell do you “Luke” a film? (Sorry, spelling errors are a big pet peeve of mine.)
By writing a seven thousand word review every two weeks while holding down a full time job,looking after a toddler and keeping on top of other writing commitments. That’s how you Luke a film.
Oh, you always have the best remarks, lol!
You know, when I first was reading this review (it was the first of your reviews I ever read) I thought I was going to hate you. But after all the reading (and subsequent laughter) I realized I couldn’t hate you, not even after the political comparisons. You’re just too much fun & are entitled to your opinion too.
You are right about several aspects of this movie that didn’t add up. Like the seasons, or the beast’s age in the painting, or several other subjects you brought up.
I can’t believe you didn’t make a joke about Gaston’s eating enough eggs to kill most people! Surely you could have mentioned some kind of cholesterol joke about that! (My dad & brother certainly did hehe).
I first want to say that Belle is my fave Disney heroine (emphasis on HEROINE. Much as I appreciate the Disney Princess line, I would like to point out that you don’t have to be royal to be a hero, and I hate it when people get it wrong out there). She and I have a lot in common. We both have brown hair, hazel eyes, like to read, are intelligent, and we had to grow up in a town full of idiots. (I suppose you’re going to hate me now :(). I mean, remove the fake French accents, insert some cars & traffic lights into that town, and modern clothes on the villagers, and you have the lousy town I was raised in. Oh yeah, & change the village homes to suburbia, forgot that.
I mean, seriously, the place I grew up in was a cultural backwater. No beaches, no fun landmarks to visit, no skyscrapers, no castles, no national parks, no mountains, no forests, no theme parks, God, there was almost NOTHING to amuse oneself. All we had was a town of 150,000 people, flat open plains, and CORN….miles & miles of CORN.
Children of the Corn: You called?
Me: Shut up!
XD couldn’t resist the reference.
If you ever visit the U.S, stay as far away from the Midwest as you can. They’re all a bunch of cliquish, mean, exclusive, narrow-minded, hypocritical morons that have spent 3 generations living there. Meanwhile my family was a much of intellectuals from the West Coast and loved to read and study science. We couldn’t have stuck out more if we’d come from another planet. Belle and her dad were just like that.
I would like to point out that Belle did have flaws, it’s just they weren’t very obvious. I mean, did she ever try making friends with the people in the village besides the book-keeper? Yeah, sure they’re morons, but the least she could have done was make friends anyway, just so they could gossip about how nice she was, instead of her “odd” fascination with books. (Incidentally, despite it being the 90s and early 2000s, the kids I went to school with treated books like the plague, which shows you my place in the scheme of things). She seemed completely clueless about just what kind of effect she was really having on the town, or how it would affect her and her dad. It happened to me a lot in my town too.
I mean, haven’t you been there mouse? Been treated like a freak because you were 1 of only 5 people in a large town that had an IQ higher than 60?
Oh, and here’s an especially juicy thing to consider. If those Bimbettes, (as they were so affectionately called) were like the townie moron kids I grew up with, they would be secretly making up lies & telling everyone in town that Belle was a lesbian for ignoring Gaston, even though it’s very clear that she isn’t a lesbian. She could see right through the [supposedly] handsome face (I really don’t consider Gaston very handsome. His gigantic cleft chin [& ego the size of Russia] turns me off).
I think Gaston wanted Belle for several reasons. For one thing, he saw her as a challenge. She wasn’t just the most beautiful girl in town, but the most mysterious and quite possibly something he would have to hunt down and win. She would have just been another trophy to him. You heard what kind of future he planned on giving her. Being a complete slave to him, a baby factory, (probably getting ridden every night like a horse), and having to massage his foul, stinky feet at night. How romantic. *pukes* It almost seems like he just wanted a pretty housekeeper that worked for free and he could screw her whenever he pleased.
You should have heard the bullshit my Child Psychology teacher told us about her views (and other idiots’ views) on “Beauty and the Beast.” Like the Beast scared children in the theater. I guess my brother and I were very brave as kids, b/c while the Beast did scare me a little bit, he didn’t deter me or my older brother from watching the movie. (I was 5, he was 8 at the time).
Or how the Beast became just another Pretty Boy at the end of the movie. You know, he’s still the guy we learned to like during the film, he’s just back to his human self, and a better person for it. I mean, if you were turned into a hideous monster, wouldn’t you want to do everything possible to turn back into a human again? (It’s not the same as being turned into a cute, foul-mouthed mouse, sorry). Besides, the implications of such a relationship as what the Furries would want makes me ill. I’ve actually read a number of other “Beauty and the Beast” books, and am often upset or disappointed when the Beast stays a Beast, even after the spell is broken. The worst offenders are Robin McKinley and Mercedes Lackey.
The worst thing the teacher said was how Belle needed a man to find happiness. Is that feminist or what? (And this coming from a female too). I don’t really think it was about having a man. (Although I think the world would be a very boring place with just women in it. Men make things interesting, don’t you agree?) I think it was more about Belle finding someone who could understand her better than those shallow jerks down in the village. Somebody who wouldn’t call her “odd” or treat her like a freak. Somebody who would treat her like an equal, instead of a wedded servant like Gaston wanted. Surely you were looking for somebody like that once? Somebody to fill the void in your life that can only be filled by one special person? Belle wasn’t just looking for adventure. She was looking for love too.
My fave song of the movie was “Beauty and the Beast,” b/c it was very sweet and romantic, very simple, and very deep. It totally reflects how deep their relationship had become, even though neither person was ready to say “I love you” just yet, but they can both feel it. There’s a lot of subtlety in the ballroom scene that not everyone can pick up on, and you KNOW it wasn’t a complete Disney movie without at least one romantic scene exclusively for the heroes and their love interest. I mean, it was a culmination of their time together and how close they had become. Belle had learned that the Beast wasn’t such a bad person (even though he still could have easily gone back to being the hell-monster you speak of), and he learned she was a kind, brave, caring person that could see him as something more than a horrendous monster.
I don’t know, maybe I’m just rambling and preaching to a brick wall. I do that a lot, even when there are people in the room ignoring me. I don’t know.
It wasn’t really the animation that led to me loving this movie. It was the story. I was okay with how it was drawn, though you’re right about some of the animation being kinda ugly in the background. Although, with some recent movies, awesome special-effects and/or animation don’t make up for a crappy story. I remember reading the original “Beauty and the Beast” fairy-tale, and I’d say the Disney one is MUCH better. I mean, it’s more “realistic” that Belle and the Beast spent time together and got to know one another, rather than both being alone and isolated from one another all day long, and only meeting at dinner. And then for the Beast to ask her to marry him each night at dinner, when she barely even knows the guy, every night, is kinda stupid.
By the way, the Academy is just a club of morons that LOVE crappy movies and HATE the good ones, and the Oscars are only a celebration for the Hollywood people (I use that term very loosely) to glorify themselves. They aren’t actually doing anything useful besides saying “Look at me!” on tv for a few hours every 2 years.
I could go on, but I think I’ve said enough. You don’t have to like a movie just b/c everyone else does, and I get the feeling there are other people who didn’t like this movie either. And so you know mouse, I hate Disney’s “Hercules” and “Hunchback of Notre Dame,” just so we’re even.
I agree with you on most things you wrote. Belle and Jane are probably my favorite Disney heroines, because they’re brainy brunettes like me. But why don’t you like “Hunchback” or “Hercules”? I like them both very much.
I’ll explain in the reviews for each movie.
Fair enough.
This is actually #5 on my top ten favorite Disney films list. Tied with Bambi, I think it has the best music out of all the canon. The animation can be clumsy (Belle’s facial structure changes too many times for me to count and the CG ballroom is badly dated) and there are a few plot holes, but overall, this is my favorite of the Disney Renaissance. The love story is mature, the characters are likable, and the music is rich.
Amen on Belle’s facial changes. It’s a little distracting at times!
Enjoyed your review and understand what you mean when you say you don’t connect with the movie but can still appreciate it (but it happens to be one of my favorites). I just wanted to chime in with my favourite scene: it’s during the big fight scene where Beast’s facial expression changes from murderous rage to merely super pissed as he dangles Gaston over the edge of the roof. I just love love love the way the animators did this, with every part of his face relaxing in a cascade. It’s beautiful!
This review was hilarious, I admit to liking it more than you do, but admit its not perfect. One huge thing that has always bothered me about the plot: the Beast puts Maurice in the dungeon for trespassing, but when Belle does the same thing he lets her trade her life for her fathers’. If anything they should both be the Beast’s prisoners since they both trespassed, don’t you think? Another question I have for you is you mentioned in your review on the wedding invitation that the Beast’s name is Adam. I’ve head this mentioned before by others, but never heard it in the film. How did you know his name? Thanks a bunch:-)
Apparently, he was named Adam in a tie-in CD Rom to the movie and it stuck with fans.
Ok thanks:-) What did u think of my trespassing theory? Do u consider it a plot hole?
Well, it’s not like Maurice has broken a law or anything, Beast is just being a disk. I think he knows that he can’t just throw Belle in a dungeon and expect her to fall in love with him. She needs to at least have free reign of the house and not be treated like a prisoner (even though she is one). Therefore, staying in the castle needs to be at least partially of her own free will which is why he accepts her offer.
That’s a good point- I never thought of it like that:-) BTW- your comment about Maurice dying in the snow for months had me in stitches:-D For some reason, I really hadn’t noticed all the time inconsistencies before.
Not even done with the review, but you’ve made me laugh so many times that I wanted to comment. Seriously good comedy writing. I can pinpoint it here to when you veer off from what actually happened in the movie to hypothetical (deadly Snow fight). Usually it’s picture placement and captions. Absorbing content for readers who grew up/memorized these movies like you did.
Thanks man, really glad you enjoyed it.
PS Your review of “Tale as Old as Time” was just in passing about the scene. You didn’t mention the lyrics, Angela Lansbury’s vocals, the pop version with Celine Dion and Peabo Bryson… What a find was Bryson for Disney (+ for Bryson)! This is a sing that pulls on the heartstrings. The best Disney songs speak about themes that people can relate to on more than a film level. It just happens to have the words, “Beauty and the Beast.” How many Disney songs do you specifically play on your own free time?
The other song that’s on part with this is, “A Whole New World.” Again, the only line to link it to the film is “on a magic carpet ride.” I’m curious what your favorite Disney songs are (Besides Mary Poppins and I Wanna Be Like You (and The Monkey’s Uncle)). (I’m also curious about what you think about the Disney live-action movies. 1950′s Treasure Island, etc. Is there anything making Pete’s Dragon/Bedknobs more “official” besides the animation? I have the feeling Lansbury was in multiple Disney live-action films. They’re a bit much to review but they follow the Disney timeline and are part of the Disney story. (And can lend color to Disney’s financial straights/success at the time of each feature film))
Ahh, so the angry mob has returned! I don’t remember hating Beauty and the Beast, but I don’t seem to remember liking it enough to be able to recite it near word for word as I do movies like The Lion King and Robin Hood. That could be because my family didn’t have the video, I don’t quite remember.
Hmm, never thought of it before, but Bambi’s mother must make a great deal of Disney canon apparently in one universe. I’ve heard it suggested that the hunters in Bambi were Gaston and his hunting pals, but that would raise questions as to what skunks and opossums were doing in France. …I’m just now realizing how weird Pépé Le Pew cartoons are. In any case, Bambi’s mother shows up in more different time periods than Jock, so she must be some kind of time lord as well. And quite the traveller too, that doe’s been from India to Britain to France to various states. In any case, the Gump reference cracked me up.
And yeah, funny Gaston shouldn’t give the triplets the time of day. Likely he’s a go-getter who suffers largely from want-what-you-can’t-have syndrome. Makes sense, he seems like the type to feel like he can conquer anything. Belle’s apparent dislike of him must’ve come off as a challenge to him, and more than a bit of a bruise to his ego. Can’t be the guy all the women want if there’s one who doesn’t want you.
Oy. I can just picture Marie Antoinette crying out, “With my final breath, I curse Maurice!” before her execution. Also, wasn’t a steam-powered lumber device part of the main conflict in that Paul Bunyan short Disney did? Man, that guy sure ruined a lot of lives, huh? And come on, you never take the path with the birds. They’ll eat your trail right up and then you’ll be up the creek. And that’s if they don’t go Hitchcock on you. Though luckily enough, Maurice’s inventively managing to breed a horse with a bloodhound apparently worked, seeing as Phillipe could track him down that easily. Wait, doesn’t “Phillipe” mean “horse lover”? That sure sounds like a narcissistic name to give to a horse.
That Christian Bale Batvoice reference just set itself up for you, didn’t it? And of course the Doctor Who reference as well. Classic.
Is it just me or does Be Our Guest sound a lot like Les Poissons in The Little Mermaid (Louis’s song)? I wonder what made Disney decide their stock French tune would be the lullaby that Darling sings in Lady and the Tramp. Also, the image of the Beast sulking and listening to pop punk music in his room is hilarious. Ahh man, I remember that song. Classic brooding tunes.
Ha ha. I remember hearing of the TV show the West Wing and wondering why they made a drama series out of that part of the Beast’s castle. Love the annoyed Obama clip. And I’m also picturing all the Haunted Mansion’s grim, grinning ghosts disappointedly powering off their computers after that paragraph telling the dead readers to screw off.
Ha ha ha, Disney and his Brooms strike again. I think that has to be my favourite running gag in this review series. Or at least the one that makes me laugh the most. And when you think about it, it’s no wonder the Beast would love Romeo and Juliet so much, being a monstrous, cruel, tyrannical prince. I take it the violence would greatly appeal to him.
Speaking of violence, man, that fight scene. Isn’t the guy that Madame kills actually shown dead later? Pretty vicious. And the part with LeFou trying to torch Lumiere (love the Indiana Jones reference) confuses me. Why is it the only time his candles melt despite their being lit for most of the movie? And if being lit does melt them at a ridiculously slow pace, why does he relight them? You’ve got to hand it to Lumiere. You don’t get a servant every day who’s willing to literally set himself on fire for you.
Also, yeah, I wondered about the Potts family. Did they all get turned into Maria Reyes-style fireworks during the fight scene? Yeesh. There is a theory I’ve seen on TV Tropes that some of the enchanted objects are extensions of some of the people, so Chip got turned into an entire set of cups, but that raises questions as to why some of the cups were apparently female. I guess that makes Chip about the only representative Disney’s got for the MPD demographic. Him and Wart. Though really, Chip’s pretty confusing when you think about it. He’s got to be, what, eleven tops? He’d have had to have been a baby when he was morphed into a cup (damn, Lady Glowerhaven is vindictive cursing an infant and an animal for a kid’s brattiness). There’s pretty good odds Chip wouldn’t know how to walk by the time he got legs again, and probably wouldn’t know how to use a chamber pot either. It has been suggested Chip was ten when the curse began and he just ceased to age once he stopped being organic, but that’s kind of a downer too, considering he would’ve been close to the prince’s age and had to watch him grow up without him.
…Yeah, I think Beauty and the Beast wins the don’t-think-too-hard award. Whoever does probably will need to power up a small steam crane claw to suspend their disbelief.
Great review. Also, the Prince bit at the end was funny. Status quo is god, is it not?
Good? Mister President it eez VITAL.
‘Beast throws Maurice into a creepy spider carriage, and tells it to “take him to the village”. Since Beast doesn’t specify which village, we can only assume the carriage takes Maurice on a tour of every small town and hamlet in Western Europe before finally bringing him home.’
Just love this bit. Hilarious. Also, regarding the prince of nowhere thing, I retract my original statement, he probably wasn’t even foreign, he was probably one of the many sons of a regional nobleman sent to be schooled elsewhere or maybe he was just being kept there as a transitional period until is application for the preisthood came through and he was really destined for the clergy or something. Noblemen and even royals with many children delegated them roles depending on their birth a lot
Also I forgot one more thing, if the villages around knew about the castle, I would have thought that they would have heard that it was abandoned so their apparent lack of interest in the castle and the beast for the whole film up until the end until they take action against what might be an urban legend, might make sense
Thank you thank you thank you. It’s so nice to find people (not just you, but even some of the commenters) who agree with me that this movie is … okay … but not the be-all and end-all that a lot of very vocal people seem to think. Is it in the top … let’s say 10% … of animated movies? Sure, but that’s a pretty low bar by Disney standards. It’s just so … soulless. I cannot watch this movie without feeling like I’m being repeatedly smacked over the head with a mallet while someone screams in my ear “Look! This right here! See how great this is? Give us an Academy Award!”
Tale as Old as Time? Soulless Oscar Bait, and Angela Lansbury doing it in her very best old-lady-at-church vibrato doesn’t do it any favors.
Be Our Guest? … okay, actually I like this one, but after reading your review I agree. I personally think its sheer exuberance redeems it somewhat, but still …
The terribly-obvious use of computer-aided animation in the final scene? Soulless. The chandelier in particular is too jarringly perfect.
There are certainly parts of the movie I like. “Gaston” is bouncy, catchy, and one of the funniest songs in the Disney canon. I also found the quality of Robbie Benson’s voice work to be a pleasant surprise (my opinion of most of Mr. Benson’s other work being essentially that he was, I am sure, a nice young man doing the best he could). But as a whole, the movie just feels too formulaic and calculated.
Glad I’m not the only one.
Hey Mouse, I had a question regarding Batb and your complaint about the background animation, were u talking about the village people? I’ve noticed that in a lot of Disney movies the surrounding characters aren’t animated as well as the main characters, ie: the people in the market place and palace guards in Aladdin, so this didn’t seem to bother me. Unless you meant something else?
My second question is on Tarzan’s animation but I am to lazy to post this on the Tarzan review so bear with me. I noticed you only gave 3 Disney movies a perfect score for animation and Tarzan is one them. While Tarzan is a beautiful movie- I do have one problem with the animation that keeps me from saying its perfect- while some of the animals are animated realistically like Kala and Kercheck, the other apes including Terk and even Tantor look too cartoony given the quality of the rest of the animation. I was wondering your feelings on this?
My last animation question is: how in the heck did The Jungle Book make it into your top 10 Disney films with such scratchy animation? Thanks for your great reviews and help with these 3 questions:-)
Yeah the animation of the villagers just stuck out as being particularly ropey. The difference in style between the comedic and dramatic characters seemed more like an artistic choice than inconsistency so I didn’t mark it down. Lastly, Jungle Book scored so high because the animation was literally the only weakness that movie had. And even then, for a Scratchy Movie the animation wasn’t that bad at all.
That makes since- thanks for the response:-)
Wow I must be really tired- sense I meant to put lol.
How you feel about “Beauty and The Beast” being something that you know is great, but can’t get that much into is how I feel about “Tangled”. I know it’s not a bad movie, but I just couldn’t get into it for numerous reasons.
And I feel that way about “The Lion KIng”.
‘But she gives Belle’s voice this kind of trembling quality that makes the character sound a lot more vulnerable and helpless than she actually is.’
I kind of liked that about her. When a person seems vulnerable but proves they’re not, it gives a different level to the character
Fair point.
Okay, so Chip is supposed to be, like, six years old, right? The curse has been active for ten years. Either Chip has been mentally frozen as a child for ten years (which is weird and creepy, because Beast definitely aged), or he was BORN A TEACUP.
This movie is like a horrific series of nesting dolls. It just gets worse the more you think about it.
Yeah, plenty of the details just don’t make sense.
While I don’t agree with a few of your points, I’m really happy you’re not condoning anyone who loves this movie. There are too many elitist reviewers out there who take some popular subject and put it in the view of “I don’t like this, and you shouldn’t either.” But you went out of the way, to not make your opinion of the film, seem above anyone else’s which I wholeheartedly appreciate.
Thanks.