Month: May 2020

Let’s all go to the theatre!

Hey, what are you doing Saturday? Well, cancel it. Put on your best duds and let’s all go get some culture. My buddies in AboutFace Theatre are premiering 8 new three-minute plays (including one by yours truly about a cult leader who has to deal with a different apocalypse from the one he was expecting) and the good news is it’s on Zoom so you don’t even have to leave the house!

We premiere on Saturday June 6th at 4pm EST (9 pm Irish Time) and you can get your tickets HERE.

Hope to see you there!

“AVENGERS! Assemble…”

Nebula Prime tries desperately to warn…

“Yeah, we’re just diving in, keep up!”

Nebula Prime tries desperately to warn Clint and Natasha but Thanos’ ship appears overhead and just scoops her up.

On Earth 2012, Scott is freaking out because they’ve lost the Tesseract and only have enough Pym particles for one more journey each. But Steve and Tony remember that Camp Lehigh (where Cap spent many an idyllic summer day knocking down flagpoles and throwing himself on grenades) held both the Tesseract and all the Pym particles they can eat. They send Scott back home with the sceptre and Steve and Tony head to their most dangerous and terrifying destination yet.

Hyuck hyuck hyuck.

While Steve goes looking to score some Pym Particle (also known by its street names: P-Dust, Shrink-a-Dink, Tom Cruise…) Tony goes looking for the Tesseract. Fortunately, the seventies were a simpler, more trusting time where people left their doors unlocked and their children near BBC presenters and the Tesseract is just stashed in a big iron box without even an alarm or anything. I’ve known packed lunches with better security. Tony runs into his father Howard and the two men talk about parenthood.

Meanwhile, Steve distracts a young Hank Pym who the movie helpfully shows was already awful in the seventies. Steve grabs a couple of test tubes of quality Smoll (as it’s sometimes called on the mean streets of the quantum realm) but has to duck into another office to avoid base security. There, he sees Peggy Carter, the lady that he abandoned for a common iceberg, the cad.

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I’ve got a little list, I’ve got a little list…

Hi all,

As promised, here’s the list of upcoming reviews in alphabetical order. If you don’t see something you requested, or if you’ve already contributed via Patreon and didn’t get a chance to request, leave me a comment and I’ll stick it on. I…may be doing this a while.

A Monster In Paris
A Series of Unfortunate Events
Aladdin the Series
Alice in Wonderland (the Disney live action one)
Ang Lee’s Hulk
Balto
Batman 1989

Batman: The Killing Joke

Bats vers Bolts: I, Frankenstein versus Dracula Untold
Bats versus Bolts: Nosferatu versus Frankenstein
Bolts versus Bats: Andy Warhol
Cinderella
Darkwing Duck

Daria: Episode 1

Detective Pikachu
Devilman Crybaby
Episode 4 of Death Parade
Episode six of Flip Flappers.
Evangelion: You are (Not) Alone
Felix the Cat
Frankenweenie

Freddie as F.R.O.7

Heavy Metal
Hercules and Xena the Animated Movie
Hoodwinked
Inherit the Wind
Into the Woods
Jimmy Neutron
John Carter

Joseph: King of Dreams

Judgement at Nuremberg
Kung Fu Panda 2
Little Mermaid the Series
Lu Over the Wall
Megamind
Metropolis (Osamu Tezuka)
Moomins on the Riviera
My Hero Academia: First 4 Episodes
Night of the Hunter

Once Upon A Time: Episodes 1 and 3

Over the Garden Wall
Pan
Perfect Blue
Planes
Raggedy Ann and Andy: A Musical Adventure
Redline
Return to Oz
Rock and Rule
Romeo and Juliet Sealed with a Kiss

Sailor Moon R: The Movie

Shin Godzilla
Something Eastern European
Summer Wars
Superman Versus the Elite
Tangled the Series
The Animatrix
The Dark Crystal
The Fantastic Adventures of Unico
The Good Dinosaur
The Land Before Time
The Land Before Time 13
The Polar Express
The Quiet Man
The Swan Princess
The Third Man
Titan AE
Tomorrowland

TMNT:Turtles Forever

V for Vendetta

Your Name

An announcement I have been waiting to make since I was eight years old.

Hi everyone. When I made my big end of year humblebrag a while back there was actually another bit of news that I couldn’t tell you because negotiations were still ongoing. So here it is.

I’ve been signed by TOR for a two book deal.

One of the largest publishers of science fiction in the world offered to publish my novel When the Sparrow Falls (until recently called The Caspian Sea) for summer 2021 with a second book for publication in summer 2022 and I said “Yes. I find this agreeable.”

This deal will be for North America and most of the world. For the non-American Anglosphere, the book will be published by Rebellion, the UK publisher of Judge Dredd.

So…

How’s you’re day going?

So, obviously this means I’m going to be spending a lot of time on edits and writing book #2 over the next three years as well as my usual work commitments.

“Aren’t you forgetting someone else?”

“Hi Dad!”

“Hi son! Are you still pooping literally all the time?”

“I am!”

Yeah. Yeah. Okay. Guys I hate to say it but it looks like I might have to shutter the blog…

“Whoah whoah, are you actually just going to throw away your hardwon fanbase RIGHT before you begin your career in publishing?”

“Not good?”

“Bit not good, yeah.”

“WHAT ABOUT US?!”

“Angry mob!?”

“WE’RE YOUR PATRONS! AND YOU OWE US REVIEWS!”

Okay. EVERYBODY CHILL! HERE is what I’m going to do:

Patreon

So I’ve put a pause on the Patreon and any patrons are not getting charged for June. Starting now I won’t be taking any more review requests because I already have a massive backlog. If you’re waiting for a review it WILL be done, but it’ll take time and with one book to be edited and a second one to be written over the next two years I will be shifting to a new schedule which means I simply can’t take any more reviews on.

SO. If you’re a $5 or a $10 Patron now would probably be a good time to cancel your pledge as I’m afraid I won’t be able to fulfill any new review requests.

New Schedule

After the conclusion of the Endgame review the blog will be shifting to an alternating monthly/bi-monthly schedule. As in, one month there’ll be one review, the next there will be two and then one again. I’m hoping this will just be temporary. I’m planning on taking a leave of absence from work later in the year to focus on being a full time writer and…wow I just wrote that. Really happening. Sorry, back on track. As I say, I will hopefully be shifting back to a twice monthly schedule in the Autumn but that will obviously depend on deadlines, workloads etc. etc.

Pending Reviews

Over the next few days I’ll be posting the complete list of scheduled, requested reviews. If you’ve requested a review that you don’t see listed leave me a comment and I’ll add it in. The reviews WILL be done, I promise.

Thank you all

Guys, some of you have been with this blog since the days when I didn’t even know how to properly crop an image. I would not be the writer I eventually became without your support. It’s been a crazy, wonderful eight years. Thank you all so much. Virtual group hug. Bring it in.

“I love you 3000.”

One of the hardest things about telling any story is sticking the landing.

A bad ending is not only bad in and of itself, it’s like a cancer that reaches back in time and kills everything that went before it. I can’t enjoy Sherlock anymore. All the clever writing and great performances and wonderful little tricksy puzzles turn to ash when you remember that it’s all leading up to Sherlock defeating his previously unknown little sister with superpowers.

The violin of Eurus Holmes (Sian Brooke) in Sherlock S04E03 | Spotern

I’d say “spoilers”, but shit doesn’t spoil.

If I had had to write the script for Endgame I’d probably have gone mad with the pressure. I remember marvelling (heh) at Joss Whedon’s script for Avengers back in 2012 and how it managed to juggle seven (SEVEN!) main characters and serve as a satisfying conclusion to five (FIVE!) films. My, how young we were. So imagine the weight of expectation resting on the shoulders of Christopher Markus, Stephen McFeely and the Russo Brothers, having to juggle a story with dozens upon dozens of named characters AND has to serve as a capstone to a 22 film cycle. I mean, Christ. I’ve only had to review these things and it feels like I’ve climbed Everest.

Did they pull it off? You probably have your own opinions on that but, well…this thing made 2.8 billion dollars at the box-office so somebody liked it.

So, because this thing is over three hours long, this review is going to be a two-parter. Also, I’m not going to do a big introduction explaining the history of these characters and the background to this movie because, well…

“What do you think I’ve been DOING for the last five years?!”

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