Szkkb Mvd Uvzi

*WHOOSH*

*WHOOSH*

“Rick? Where are we…I...uh…I think I’m going to be sick, Rick…”

“Rick? Where are we…I…uh…I think I’m going to be sick, Rick…”

“Go right ahead Morty, it’s a blog. It’s probably about par for the usual *URP!* content.”

“Go right ahead Morty, it’s a blog. It’s probably about par for the usual *URP!* content.”

“I mean it Rick, I’m uh, freakin’ out here! Why am I in a little box?! Why are my words appearing below me?! Do I even still have legs?!"

“I mean it Rick, I’m uh, freakin’ out here! Why am I in a little box?! Why are my words appearing below me?! Do I even still have my junk?!”

“There, there Morty. You’re just suffering from medium-transition anxiety and the fact that you’re a moist little *()(. We’re in a universe that runs on vastly different rules than ours.”

“There, there Morty. You’re just suffering from medium-transition anxiety and the fact that you’re a moist little PUSSY. We’re in a universe that runs on vastly different rules than ours.”

"What rules?"

“What rules?”

“Running gags and fair use, mostly. We’re in a blog called Unshaved Mouse.”

“Running gags and fair use, mostly. We’re in a blog called Unshaved Mouse.”

“Unshaved Mouse? I’ve never heard of it.”  “Exactly, Morty, that’s the whole *URP!* point. NOBODY’S heard of it. Which makes it the perfect hiding place.”

“Unshaved Mouse? I’ve never heard of it.”
“Exactly, Morty, that’s the whole *URP!* point. NOBODY’S heard of it. Which makes it the perfect hiding place.”

"Hiding place for what?"

“Hiding place for what?”

“Recently a friend of mine had a run in with a nasty mother*(*. Almost took over his entire universe, which means he almost took over OUR universe too...” “Uh huh. So what happened?”

“Recently a friend of mine had a run in with a nasty motherfucker. Almost took over his entire universe, which means he almost took over OUR universe too…”
“Uh huh. So what happened?”

“Don’t interrupt Morty, and wait until you get your own box to speak, I don’t want to have to share *URP!* caption space, it gets really cramped and ugly looking.”

“Don’t interrupt Morty, and wait until you get your own box to speak, I don’t want to have to share *URP!* caption space, it gets really cramped and ugly looking.”

like-this

"Like this?"

“Like this?”

"Jesus, it’s like watching a chimp try to drive. Anyway, my buddy iced the bastard but see the thing is, this bastard was funny, charming, scary and probably one of the greatest bastards ever seen in any multiverse. And bastards like that never, ever, stay dead."

“Jesus, it’s like watching a chimp try to drive. Anyway, my buddy iced the bastard but see the thing is, this bastard was funny, charming, scary and probably one of the greatest bastards ever seen in any multiverse. And bastards like that never, ever, stay dead.”

“Like you?”  “Exactly like me Morty. You think if I ever died I’d *URP!* stay dead?”  “No way.”

“Like you?”
“Exactly like me Morty. You think if I ever died I’d *URP!* stay dead?”
“No way.”

“Exactly. Time travel, clone, alternate universe doppleganger, magic, mad science and those are just off the top of my *URP!* head. If I die, I’m coming back hell or high *URP!* fucking water.”

“Exactly. Time travel, clone, alternate universe doppleganger, magic, mad science and those are just off the top of my *URP!* head. If I die, I’m coming back hell or high *URP!* fucking water.”

“So here’s the plan, instead of just sitting around waiting for him to come back, or trying to stop him coming back which will be absolutely 100% guaranteed set in train a series of events that will *URP!* bring him back, we’re just going to dump the body in a reality completely divorced from ours and let the locals worry about it. We’re the US, the body is some nuclear waste, and this blog is *URP!* Somalia.”

“So here’s the plan, instead of just sitting around waiting for him to come back, or trying to stop him coming back which will be absolutely 100% guaranteed set in train a series of events that will *URP!* bring him back, we’re just going to dump the body in a reality completely divorced from ours and let the locals worry about it. We’re the US, the body is some nuclear waste, and this blog is *URP!* Somalia.”

“Can I help you two?”

“Can I help you two?”

"OH GEE RICK WHAT THE HELL IS THAT!"

“OH GEE RICK WHAT THE HELL IS THAT!”

“It’s clearly Latin America Morty. Wow, American education system, take a *URP!*  bow.”

“It’s clearly Latin America Morty. Wow, American education system, take a *URP!* bow.”

“Are you readers? Mouse isn’t going to be back until February…”

“Are you readers? Mouse isn’t going to be back until February…”

“We’re not readers, we’re not part of the blog and “Mouse” can eat a fat one. We’re just trans dimensional visitors and we come bringing a gift. Morty, give the continent that bag.” “Okay Rick.”

“We’re not readers, we’re not part of the blog and “Mouse” can eat a fat one. We’re just trans dimensional visitors and we come bringing a gift. Morty, give the continent that bag.”
“Okay Rick.”

“Oh. Um. Thanks?”

“Oh. Um. Thanks?”

"No worries, peace out Amigo. Dont start any long books. Wubba lubba dub dub!"

“No worries, peace out Amigo. Don’t start any long books. Wubba lubba dub dub!”

 “Huh. What a nice man.”

“Huh. What a nice man.”

“Latin America? What are you doing out here?”

“Latin America? What are you doing out here?”

“Having the weirdest day. Christopher Lloyd just showed up and gave me a gift.”

“Having the weirdest day. Christopher Lloyd just showed up and gave me a gift.”

“Oh yeah? What is it?

“Oh yeah? What is it?

“I’m…not sure.”

“I’m…not sure.”

bill

15 comments

  1. This was awesome. Rick and Morty is awesome. Gravity Falls is awesome. Unshaved Mouse? Awesome.

    Here’s to 2017 being awesome. After 2016, how hard can it be? That’s like going up for karaoke after Gilbert Gottfried, you just need to not be horrible to get applause.

    1. Let’s just hope 2017 doesn’t actually go after Gilbert Gottfried… Y’know, like 2016 went after Prince, Bowie, Rickman, Fisher, etc…

  2. Remember when all our animated villains were funny, charming and scary? A girl had role models then.

    ////( v”v )\\\\

  3. Dear god I love the idea that Stan and Rick are best friends. Which Stan? Either. Both.

    Smort way to tease the review! Looking forward to the Fourth Or So Coming of Mouse. Happy New Year everybody!

  4. I feel sorry for Bill. He was the big fish in his own pond but now he has to share a space with good old Uncle Walt. That triangle is going down.

  5. Happy 2017, Mouse! Charlie Stross wrote up a cheerful, optimistic three-parter on what we can expect…

    http://www.antipope.org/charlie/blog-static/2016/12/things-can-only-get-better-par.html

    http://www.antipope.org/charlie/blog-static/2016/12/youre-only-supposed-to-blow-th.html

    http://www.antipope.org/charlie/blog-static/2017/01/things-can-only-get-better-red.html

    So, while we’re dodging military crises, economic meltdowns, the mother of malware attacks, and the Trumputinfarage, we’ll be checking in on the reviews. A quick question/suggestion: have you considered putting together some kind of analogue for the “rankings” page for all the non-Disney canon reviews? It’d be convenient to have all of them together in roughly the same place for easy access.

    1. I do want to make it easier to sort reviews by score but if I had a ranking board for the non canon reviews I’d have to update it for every New review and I try to avoid situations that pit my laziness against my OCD.

      1. Oooh, oooh, Mouse, is there going to be some kind of story arc here like you used to do on this blog more often, except with Rick, Morty and Bill Cipher being involved this time? That’d be so AWESOME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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