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Some movies belong to a genre, others define a genre.
For example, if someone ever asked you “What’s Film Noir?” you could do no better than to plonk them in front of The Maltese Falcon and say “That.”
That movie perfectly encapsulates everything that we associate with the genre; the moody black and white photography, the moral ambiguity, cynical gumshoes, treacherous dames, shifty foreigners and all the fedoras in the world. We might argue over whether it’s the best Film Noir, but it’s definitely the most Film Noir.
It’s like, how much more noir could it be? And the answer is none. None more noir.
Which brings me nicely, like the old blogging pro I am, to Return to the Sea, which I feel confident in calling The Maltese Falcon of Disney Sequels.
“Well, I’ll take that as a compliment.”
“Yeah, don’t.”
I haven’t seen all the DTV sequels but I’ve seen enough.
I’ve seen enough like George C Scott saw enough in Hardcore.
But, fair is fair, they have occasionally been able to surprise me. Some of the very best, I’ll even concede, are slightly better than the very worst of the official canon. But Return to the Sea will not surprise you. If you picture the platonic ideal of “Disney Sequel”, this is it. This is exactly what you imagined. A palpable lack of effort leaches into every cel of this misbegotten thing. Mulan 2, whatever its crimes against its heroine, has a loopy, unpredictable “what is it going to do next?!” chutzpah that I have to admit I kind of enjoyed. But Return to the Sea provides the kind of soul crushing tedium that can only be provided by watching a movie you’ve already seen but worse in every respect.
Scalpels at the ready folks. Let’s make some sushi.
The movie begins, like its predecessor, with a seagull flying over an overcast sea and a boat with a crew of singing sailors Yo-Ho-Hoing and what not. Ariel and Eric are taking their baby daughter Melody to meet her grandfather for the first time. Ariel is still voiced by Jodi Benson but Eric is now voiced by Rob Paulsen and it is distracting as all get out. Seriously, the whole movie is like:
“Eric! Morgana will stop at nothing to get our daughter!”
“Don’t worry my love. I’ll never let that happen.”
“I love you so much.”
“Helloooooooo nurse!”
Triton gives Melody a magical pendant/musicbox/holocron that projects a magical vision of Atlantica, the home of the merpeople that is like Atlantis if it had a name that Disney could trademark . Alright, so it’s time to meet our villain. So Ursula, remember her? She had a sister. And this sister was crazy. And we know this because she suddenly appears out of the ocean and Sebastian yells:
“URSULA’S CRAZY SISTER!”
Writing.
That’s not half-assed. That is no-assed. That is utterly without buttock. That is a god-damned travesty is what it is. Look, I’m as glad to see Pat Carroll back as anyone, and it’s not like Ursula’s sister showing up to get revenge is a bad idea in and of itself. But they do nothing with her. She’s Ursula in all but name with a less interesting design and a far worse script and no good villain song. Even her scheme is exactly the same: get Triton’s fricking trident to rule over the sea. Whooop dee do. Hey, know what would have been better than that? Have her want the trident so she can resurrect Ursula and then we have two Pat Carroll voiced octopus women for the price of one. Or use her to explore some of Ursula’s backstory, we never actually found out why she was exiled after all. There are so many better ways they could have gone but instead we have:
“URSULA’S CRAZY SISTER!”
Because, as we will see in every second of this thing, they just didn’t care. So Morgana causes Triton to drop the pendant so that it sinks to the bottom of the see and then she threatens to feed Melody to her henchfish, a shark named Undertow voiced by Clancy Brown, and stop. I know what you’re thinking. “Shark voiced by Clancy Brown” should be awesome, shouldn’t it? But this movie lies. It always lies.
Anyway, Morgana offers Triton a deal; Melody for the trident. Ariel actually does something useful and takes Eric’s sword and guts some of the rigging which causes a mast to smack Morgana in the mush and drop Melody. Eric swings out and catches her and Trident blasts Undertow with the trident, turning him into a minnow. Morgana gives the standard “You haven’t heard the last of me!” and vamooses.
Alright, so almost having your baby fed to a shark is something that every parent dreads and we can’t really fault Ariel and Eric for wanting to be sure it never happens again but dang they overreact a tad. This is their plan:
1) They erect a big beautiful wall around the palace and make the ocean pay for it.
2) They ensure that Melody is never ever allowed anywhere near the ocean and lastly
3) Absolutely never, ever tell Melody the reason why she can’t go near the ocean, who Morgana is, what she looks like, or any such highly crucial information because then, obviously, we’d have no movie.
So a few years pass and Melody has grown into a clone of Ariel with black hair. Sebastian, who has been appointed by Triton to watch over Melody finds her swimming out past the sea wall where she just happens to find the pendant that Triton dropped all those years ago. So here’s a thought; Sebastian’s has got to be getting on now, right? I mean, it’s hard to say what kind of crab he is (Genie refers to him as a king crab in Aladdin so let’s go with that) which means he’s got a lifespan of thirty years max. He was already Triton’s second in command in Little Mermaid 3 which is set around fifteen years before LM2 and he can’t have been a young crab then. How awful is it for Sebastian to have to spend his twilight years scuttling around the arid surface world, exiled from everyone he’s ever known and loved, no longer able to write his beloved symphonies, wheezing around on hard marble tiles after yet another disobedient, selfish princess? Is this his reward for a lifetime’s loyal service?
My point is, Triton is history’s greatest monster.
Anyway, Melody remembers that she’s supposed to be at her own birthday party and she has to hurry back and runs into some mean snooty kids who make fun of her because she’s barefoot and talks to fish and excuse me a moment…
“BUUUUUUULLLLSHIIIIIIT!”
Yeah, you can’t play the “she’s the weird girl that nobody likes and has no friends” card and have her be a frickin’ PRINCESS that makes no sense. She’s the top of the social ladder by default. If she wants to run around barefoot and talk to fish, all the snooty kids are going to run around barefoot and talk to fish because that’s how popular kids think. Like idiots.
Ariel helps her get ready but Melody doesn’t want to have a party because everyone think’s she’s weird and Ariel tells her that all girl’s her age have trouble fitting in.
“Now give me the names of those mean kids and I’ll make sure they’re never heard of again.”
The party ends in disaster when Sebastian (who’s been accidentally tied into Melody’s dress) pinches the boy Melody’s been dancing with.
We’ve all been there, dude.
Then, Sebastian gets thrown into the cake which was being wheeled in by Louis who is apparently still working in the palace, you know, just gutting and cooking fish which Ariel and Sebastian both know are living, thinking, sentient beings this world is a horror show I tell you, a moral travesty. And then Louis chases Sebastien around the place while everyone laughs at the Princess of the nation which of course would totally happen because princesses are just like us. Melody goes to sob in her room about how nobody likes her and being a princess is so hard because nobody wants to be your friend and she opens the pendant and Ariel is all “You went out to the ocean again didn’t, DIDN’T YOU?!” and do you see what they did there, those sons of bitches?
“You could have been seen by one of those barbarians, by one of those FISH!”
“Mom, have you been drinking again?”
Anyway, Melody storms out and Eric asks what’s the haps and Ariel says that maybe it’s time to tell their daughter why she has to be kept permanently away from water like a common mogwai.
But, of course, it’s too late. Melody has run away from home and taken a boat that was on the shore near the castle and just sailed away. Where is the wall that was supposed to prevent this very thing, you ask? Good question. And the answer is LOOK A SQUIRREL!
Aw, look at his little face.
Anyway, Melody gets picked up by Undertow who takes Melody to the Arctic where Morgana has her lair. Morgana tells Melody that her destiny is to be a mermaid and turns her into one and doesn’t even ask for her voice or nuffink.
Meanwhile, Ariel tells Triton that Melody is missing and he promises that he’ll search every inch of the ocean.
“We’ll search every reef, every abyss, every undersea cave!”
“Daddy, she can’t breathe underwater.”
“OH JESUS SHE’S DEAD!”
Triton turns Ariel back into a mermaid and she goes swimming through the sea, looking pretty much identical to how she did when she was a teenager.
Oh yeah. That’s totally a woman who’s had a kid.
We now get a song called “For a Moment” which is a long distance duet between Melody and Ariel. The lyrics are pretty much unsalvageable but my God if you ever needed proof that Jodi Benson can make anything sound halfway decent, here it is. Less sucessful is the animation, that tries to represent her holding a note by having her stretch into an eel woman.
She looks like a Little Mermaid themed Pez dispenser.
If a Canadian ever gets smug around you because Canada didn’t have slavery, just remind them what their animators did to Glen Keane’s Ariel design because that is an atrocity right there.
Melody returns to Morgana to thank her and Morgana says that unfortunately she can’t make the spell permanent and Melody is distraught she doesn’t want to go back and WOW. This kid is a piece of work. You know, say what you will about Ariel, but when she realised that becoming a human would mean never seeing her father and sisters again, that was at least a negative. That was something in the “con” column, y’know? With Melody it’s all “I have to see my loving parents again? Oh woe is me!”
Anyway, Morgana tells Melody that she could make her a mermaid permanently if Melody stole “her” trident which she says was stolen from her by a “kleptomaniac” many years ago.
“Real nasty guy. Total dictator. Rageaholic. Abusive to his daughters. Used to imprison people for playing music, can you believe it? And wow, I just realised I’m the hero of this thing.”
Anyway, Melody swims off to get the Trident and Morgana has the unmitigated gall to do the “Sneaky Ursula” pose which she has in no way earned because her evil plan is hot garbage in the sun.
Stones on you, lady.
You have your arch-enemy’s grand-daughter in your power and instead of, I dunno, RANSOMING HER FOR THE TRIDENT you’re just going to stake it all on this twelve year old girl who literally just learned how to swim with fins into a heavily guarded installation to steal the oceanic equivalent of the nuclear codes? WHILE THE ENTIRE OCEAN IS LOOKING FOR HER?! No wonder your mother preferred Ursula! You deserved her contempt!
Okay guys, I’m gonna need you to do me a solid here. This is Tip and Dash:
They are a seal and a penguin who Melody meets on her way to Atlantica and I can’t deal with them. They are just the worst kind of extraneous animal comedic sidekick. They make Flit and Meeko look like Genie and Carpet. Everything about them hurts me personally. I mean. It’s a fucking penguin. That either means that Melody travelled all the way to the fucking South Pole from Pseudo-Denmark or there are somehow penguins in the North Pole in this world. I don’t know why Artic penguins makes me angrier than talking penguins, but there we are. Anyway. I’m gonna need to pretend that these two ballsacks don’t exist and not reference them at any other point in the review. That cool with you? Thanks.
Melody sneaks into Atlantica and hides in the throne room where around two minutes of observing Triton is enough to convince her that he really is the tyrannical rage-case she made him about to be, funny that. And how much must it suck to be a fish living in this kingdom and being told that you have to drop everything you’re doing again because one of the king’s relatives has gone missing again and that’s obviously more important than anything you’ve got going on, peasant. I swear, if there’s not a communist uprising after this, these fish deserve Triton.
“Onward compadrés!”
So Melody steals the trident and amscrays back to Morgana and Ariel shows up and tells her not to give it to her and Melody is all “you really think I’m going to trust my own mother over this nice lady I literally met three hours ago?” and gives her the big fork.
So now, of course Morgana is the ruler of all the oceans, the waves obey her every whim, the sea and all its spoils bow to her *inaudible*. And you know what that means! It’s time for Eric to roll up with a big wooden phallic and plow into her.
Unfortunately, Morgana destroys the ship and all seems lost but, in what may be the one improvement on the original movie, the titular Little Mermaid actually gets to be the hero of her own story and Melody wrests the Trident from Morgana with the help of…someone. I dunno. Can’t ‘member.
Melody turns the Trident on Morgana and freezes her in a block of ice which sinks to the ocean floor, the way that ice does.
With the threat ended, Trident gives Melody a choice. She can go back to live on land with her parents, or she can stay in the ocean with him. And hey, Triton, you want to run that past her parents first? You don’t? You’re a massive dick? Okay, just checking.
Instead, Melody does a Reagan and tears down that wall, uniting land and ocean forever. Henceforth, fish and human will love one another as brothers, and joy and harmony shall reign.
***
Anyone who says all the Disney sequels are as bad as each other is a liar and you can tell them Mouse said so. LM2 isn’t as incompetent as Hunchback 2 or as wrongheaded as Mulan 2 but it easily has the most contempt for its audience of any of the sequels I’ve watched so far. Hunchback 2, whatever its myriad faults, did not try and palm off FROLLO’S CRAZY BROTHER on us. Every second of this thing seems to hiss “Whaddya want? The same old pap? Here! Here’s your pap! And I hope you choke on it!” It is the Disney sequel in its purest form, and I can think of no greater insult than that.
Scoring
Animation: 4/20
Oh yeah. I love me some kludgey, off-model Disney DTV animation. Yup. That’s my jam right there.
Leads: 3/20
We’ve got Ariel but worse. And Melody, who’s Ariel. But worse.
Villain: 4/20
I have given this a lot of thought and I have decided that Morgana is a worse Mermaid villain than Marina Del Rel. I am thirty five years old.
Supporting Characters: 3/20
Nothing like watching beloved characters from your childhood settle into ugly middle aged mediocrity. Christ, I need a drink.
Music: 7/20
The songs are terrible but every so often a refrain from the original movie’s score will waft over like a memory of happier times.
FINAL SCORE: 21%
NEXT UPDATE: 27 September 2018
NEXT TIME: Oh hey, speaking of series nadirs…
unshavedmouse 
This is actually one of the first DTV Disney sequels I ever watched. Didn’t mind it that much when I first saw it, definitely don’t care for it now. (Though pedantry compels me too point out that that character who shall not be named is a walrus, not a seal.) The only really salvageable thing I can say about it is that it gave Tara Strong the joy of working alongside Jodi Benson (She actually started crying tears of joy when she met her. True story.)
Also, something that this film made me realize is that Ariel is the only Disney Princess who has a child. I’m not sure how I feel about that.
The only one with a child? Wait, that can’t be right.
*one Google binge later*
Well, that’s just… wrong.
The only one we KNOW about, at least – and surely we can leave Our Disney Princesses their own private lives, no matter how enquiring minds might be moved to wonder? (-:
“Ariel is the only Disney Princess who has a child.”
Descendants never happened and we’re all better off for it.
I forgot all about Descendants. I never watched that, so I never took that into consideration. I’m guessing it sucks ass?
Personally I can’t bring myself to hate this movie, as it was one of the staples from my childhood. That being said…Yeah, there’s DEFINITELY some narrative and character flaws to be found here. I still adore Melody and hey, at least the animation isn’t Hunchback 2 levels of awful.
This is the only Disney movie that I FORGOT seeing. As in, forgot until you showed the image last time, and I was like, “huh, I never saw that, may as well check it out oh wait we literally have this on dvd less than 20 feet from me.”
Ha!
I was expecting Comrade Crow to make an appearance in the middle and… ooooh, squirrel.
Oh, God… I actually loved this movie when I was a kid. Aside from Ariel having a daughter and that the villain was a thin version of Ursula, I didn’t really remember anything of it. I’ve caught this movie a couple times in Disney Channel, I think, and well… it’s terrible. The most prominent aspect is that it is simply lazy. It’s a rehash of the original, but without substance or heart. And I refuse to believe that the redheaded woman who appears in this movie is Ariel. It must be an impostor or something. I mean, look at her and that neck!
I must say, though, that I don’t really mind Tip and Dash that much. Doug Walker described them as sea Timon and Pumba, but without the charm or fun. Also, I kind of like the opening song, mostly Jodi’s part, of course. The other I don’t care about. Though I think I heard a little of Part of your World somewhere… Anyway, your description was pretty spot on “We’ve got Ariel but worse. And Melody, who’s Ariel. But worse”. It also applies to the movie as a whole “We’ve got The Little Mermaid. But much worse”. It’s simply so lazy. Nobody cared or even tried, except Jodi and perhaps Tara.
Excellent and hilarious review as always Mouse.
Thanks RG
I love Tara Strong and I love Jodi Benson. I love Rob Paulsen too (the man can cast a pod), though he sounds nothing like Prince Eric. And you’ve got the other returning cast members like Kenneth Mars, Pat Carrol, Samuel E. Wright…
But a good cast certainly does not a good movie make. Sequels that do the same thing as the original but inferior are the worst kind of sequels. Say what you will about dreck like Highlander 2, but at least they can be vaguely interesting in a “where the hell are they going with this” way. But there is nothing you can get from Little Mermaid 2 that could couldn’t get by watching Little Mermaid again.
Ooh, X-Men origins. I’ve watch every other X-Men movie multiple times, but this is one I’ve all but stricken from memory. All I remember is pain.
“All I remember is pain.” Just like Wolverine.
The Maltese Falcon is a poor representation of the Film Noir since it has a dull underwhelming Femme Fatale.
This movie actually makes me nostalgic for that evil Manta Ray guy from the cartoon. Even if he did suddenly become good and ruin his character in his last appearance.
Hey what about the Lobster Mobster?
I vaguely remember that guy, mostly because he was voiced by Tim Curry.
And you can never say no to Tim Curry.
Awesome review!
Thanks!
I’m actually a big fan of Rob Paulson, and he’s usually a pretty good mimic, but I haven’t seen either Little Mermaid or this “sequel” recently enough to remember if he does the original justice. Looks like no. Although the idea of replacing Eric with Yakko is hilarious to me.
Oh X-Men origins. Sadly, this was actually the first X-Men movie I saw in theaters. 😥
This was, I think, the first movie I ever had described to me as “bad fanfiction” and now, having read this, I think there have to be fan sequels out there better plotted than this.
I, uh, I remember rather liking the first Wolverine movie, but I was in middle school and it had my favorite X-Man Gambit in the movies for the first time. I suppose it’s due for a rewatch so I can revise that opinion.
Yes your opinion is wrong and must be changed. I shall mould you in my own graven image.
I have to admit that I’m enjoying you struggling with the Disney sequels perhaps a bit much. These tend to show up on Wednesday nights of fairly stressful weeks so the knowledge that somewhere in Ireland a Mouse spins the dross of Disney into informed, clever entertainment brings me wondrous joy.
Glad to be of service. *spins merrily*
Hey there Mouse! Long time reader, first time writer.
Not just here, but as a blogger in general.
Anywho, I have to agree that a shark voiced by Clancy Brown should be awesome in ways that can’t be described. But they messed it up, they found a way to mess that up. (sigh)
By the way, as someone who actually lives within spitting distance of San Francisco I can confirm that they actually 𝘥𝘪𝘥 try and make the “The Maltese Falcon” even more noir. But for some reason everyone started speaking French and had to tone it back. It’s one of the great movie mysteries.
But I’ll be sending as much positive energy I can for your next review.
Because for X-Men Origins? You’ll need it.
Thanks mh, welcome to the blog!
Amusingly, Frollo actually did have a brother in the original novel, Jehan. He was a drunk who constantly asked Claude for money, and in the 1939 Hunchback movie with Charles Laughton as Quasimodo, Jehan was the villain instead of Claude and was a judge (which is probably where Disney got the idea to make Claude a judge).
This was my favourite of the Disney sequels as a kid and my nostalgia goggles hurt after reading this. You are in no way, shape or form incorrect in your assessment of the film though. It is very mediocre. I do still kind of love the moment in the end when Melody realizes that she’s the only one with legs who can do anything about “Ursula’s crazy sister” (ugh) and then freaking stabs her.
“Villain: 4/20” nice
I just wanted to pop in and say this review went swimmingly, but was then caught amidships by the thought that Mouse might get a little salty after being forced to swallow such a pun hook, line & sinker (my own jokes watering down his tempest of mirth) and decided that it might be wiser to rethink my leading line so that we could all enjoy a whale of a time.
One would appreciate suggestions, though any red herring will be heartily resented!
You utter cod.
I’d like to claim that this was a calculated bid to break your spirit – being obliged to review one of the more foetid relics to be found amidst the flotsam & jetsam of Disney Sequels, facing a review of WOLVERINE ORIGINS (’nuff said) AND suffering such an appalling sequence of fishy puns? (and not FRESH fish either).
Why if you weren’t you, a Tragic Madness of ennui might ensue!
One is, however, obliged by essential honesty to admit that the thought “This review went swimmingly, but Mouse might get salty if I try that sort of pun on HIS blog” struck me and the Imp of Mischief which I shall henceforth blame for my own Delusions of Humour started my fingers a-dancing over the keyboards like a monkey under the organ grinder’s influence.
You know, as they do.
On a less serious note, I wanted to note that while one will happily join my voice to the Chorus-Mob dinging WOLVERINE ORIGINS, that film DOES boast one of my favourite Marvel movie themes/opening credits sequences (mostly courtesy of Mr Harry Gregson-Williams, whom I was surprised to learn actually has a brother composer who was responsible for the even more excellent WONDER WOMAN soundtrack).
I’m not going to claim ORIGINS is a Very Good movie, but at least it has its Moments!
Also, if it will ease your pain a little, you might like to know that (during the vaguely 19th Century period during which the LITTLE MERMAID movies play out) the Northern Hemisphere actually boasted its own equivalent to the penguins of the South Pole – the Great Auk, which if memory serves held out longest in territories like Iceland& Greenland that (at this time) were both dependencies of the Danish Crown.
I’m not sure if it will actually cheer you up to know this, but Mouse can go DARK, so here it is – the Great Auk went extinct, so not only will Tip-or-Dash never trouble you more neither will its species. Clearly this film was so joyless a mediocrity the void at its core sent chills of a thrilling dread backwards through time, driving poor senseless fools to make spirited attempts to kill off all possible inspirations for this supreme example of the cynical sequel.
Perhaps the innocent suffered along with the guilty, just a little …
Fantastic review as always, Mr. Mouse! Can’t wait for the next. (Also, Yakko Warner as Prince Eric is the best thing I never knew I needed)
There was something I was going to to say but all I can think of is that adorable little squirrel.
What was it?
Oh right, the kind of historical nitpick that makes you both hate me and know that no one has commandeered my computer. Canada did in fact have slavery so they can double shut up.
Okay, but just imagine what FROLLO’S CRAZY BROTHER would be. Would they get Tony Jay? Tim Curry? Would he up the whole angry fireplace thing and try to make out with the Eiffel tower? Imagine them actually bothering to try to match Hellfire, and how abysmal that would be. THE WORLD NEEDS TO KNOW!
These days they would probably just give Mr Benedict Cumberbatch a call – it does sound rather in his wheelhouse – though if they ever want a Live Action Frollo I would personally back Mr Michael Mcelhatton from GAME OF THRONES (especially after his cameo in JUSTICE LEAGUE, which left me enduringly disappointed that Wonder Woman’s rogues gallery doesn’t boast an ersatz Judge Claude Frollo!).
Hey look, a squirrel!
You know, that makes me think. I’m suddenly envisioning a movie with a big, dramatic plot, but a number of big, gaping plot holes, like important characters disappearing from the story, inconsistent backstories, that sort of thing; and every time someone draws attention to them, a squirrel runs by, distracting the audience. 🤔
And then you get to the end of the movie, and it turns out that the squirrel was actually Ratatoskr, and he’s been behind everything from the beginning, with the sole motivation of being a jerk. And then he tricks Nidhogg and Vedrfolnir into having a fight right in the middle of the human kingdom, because that’s the kind of thing Ratatoskr finds funny. And they all live happily ever after, or at least the ones named “Ratatoskr” do. 😋
…Hmm? Review? What review? Sorry, the squirrel distracted me. 😝
That’s his job.
Hmmm … clearly if we want to focus things will have to get a little grey – or is that idea just too nutty?
Do you have any way to find old Disney sequel reviews like you do with normal ones?
I think the concept of Melody being both a human and a mermaid and that she is kind of a YA protagonist in a war with her secret past and more complex backstory being unraveled is interesting ( unraveled to her, we of course know and would know even if you had seen the previous film due to the opening). But the film does not take the most out of it really and since we know what is going on it’s less interesting.
And I have red enough royal bios to know that awkward royalty isn’t news. If you reach certain level of wealth and privilege manners and far more important than to us. Nearly the kids in the party would be royalty or high nobility who would be less interested in titles than we are. Additionally it’s never stated that Eric is anywhere near the throne despite being a Prince so the kids talking to Melody could actually be more rich abt important than she is.
There are some typos here but I can’t edit, ups. Hope the text is readable.
Type Disney(ish) in the search box and they should come up
I expect at least one Moana joke!
I am but one Mouse!
All I know is, after Mulan 2, Little Mermaid II and X-Men Origins, you deserve treating yourself to an actually good movie afterwards.
Yeah, but they’re harder to write
Great review, Mouse. I remember being hyped for this movie as a kid, but once I watched it, my main reaction was “meh.” I was coming up with better adventures playing with my dolls.
I disagree. I think Marina Del Ray is worse than Morgana. I felt like Morgana at least some semblance of menace, even if it wasn’t much. Marina didn’t have any, and she was annoying, irritating to watch, and was completely pointless as a character. I also feel like Morgana had a reason to be there (she was Ursula’s sister), even if it wasn’t a good one.
Ah yes, the absolute first Disney sequel I watched. I actually preferred it to the original.
When I was 5.
What was wrong with me
10000% agree that the plot and villain are hot garbage and should never be spoken of again. That said I actually like Melody a LOT. her character design is really good. She’s got a lot of Ariel but she has her Dad’s eyebrows and despite the movie repeating ad nauseum that she’s just like her mother her personality reminds me far more of Eric. AKA the parent that was actually super into the ocean and seemed to have a hard time making friends given his support system was dog, old dude advisor/possible former regent, and his housekeeper. And Tara Strong voices Mel to perfection. I just have a soft spot for the neurotic preteen little mess. I want to give her a hug. And a script that isn’t awful.
Back to the awful-Ariel’s characterization BLOWS and Eric’s would too if he had any to speak of. I think he gets like 11 lines in the whole damn movie. Which might explain why Disney decided not to shell out for Chris Barnes despite having brought him in to play Charming in Cinderella 2 like a year earlier NO I’m NOT BITTER. *cough*
Also whhhhy did they go next generation in the first place when they had a ton of material to work with set right after the ending of the first one. Fill in the gaps between Ariel and Eric’s beach kiss and the wedding. There is so much you could do with the personal relationships and conflicts and just the whole scope of human/merpeople relations. Five words: Ariel brings Eric to Atlantica. Even the laziest most pedestrian version of that would have been a million times better than what we got with this. Or Ariel’s Beginning for that matter. *grumbles*
Maybe I’m crazy, but I never was a DTV sequel hater.
So I must admit that I liked this movie…
Okay, the songs are kind of bad even if Jodi Benson in particular is a great singer.
And how is it even possible to make Ariel’s neck look like a Pez dispenser?
But I don’t mind anything else, really.
It is really interesting to see Melody and Ariel act like Ariel and Triton once did.
Sometimes, you seem to repeat the mistakes of your parents without wanting to.
And when it comes Morgana, she is clearly copying Ursula’s scheme for a reason.
She is really obsessed with succeeding where her sister failed to prove a point.
Thus I don’t mind the parts where this movie seems to mimick its predecessor.
And I feel that enough details were different to make everything work.
Now, I happened to be just as annoyed as The Mouse was by one more thing.
There should be no penguins in the Northern Hemisphere even in a cartoon!
I’m sorry, but that irked me more than it should.
But fortunately, one of the earlier commenters reminded me of that auks exist.
So now I decided that Tip is an auk, and that is final!
I just want to say I enjoyed your review, I was laughing so hard. I agree with everything, this film is pretty bad but I believe most of these dtvs were probably targeted for a very young audience, plus riding on the backs of the successful classic films. Young kids don’t care what animation they watch. However, they could have made a better effort but chose to be lazy, mostly due to greed. The LM TV series was far more entertaining, and they seem to care more about it. There is a small cult following of Melody despite a lack of her characterization, but I feel this is because it’s trendy to defend something almost universally panned, same as hating something largely popular. People are strange.
People are DERANGED my friend. Really glad I got a chuckle.
Or can it be possible that some people like something even if you don’t?
Like I said, I kind of liked this movie.
Or could it be that some people like something even if you don’t?
This movie is not that bad.
Actually I wasn’t talking to you, I was speaking to the OP. Good if you like it, I don’t care. Does anyone care if I don’t? No. So don’t talk down to me.