Announcing the Unshaved Mouse 20/20 Oscars!

People in the past are idiots. Look at them there, waging pointless wars, dying of diseases that we can now easily cure and not appreciating the genius of Van Gogh. Bunch of putzes.

Here in the future of course, we know better. Wouldn’t it be great if we could go back in time and show those darn pasties how do to do things right? Well, here’s the next best thing.

Every year the Oscars roll around and every year I mark the occasion by doing absolutely nothing. You see, despite being a movie buff I just can’t frickin’ stand the Oscars. I hate the whole dull circle jerk. I hate that the “right” movie almost never wins, and that even when it does it inevitably suffers a hipster backlash from insufferable  up their ass movie nerds like…well…me. But I also object to the whole idea. What was the best movie last year? I don’t know. You don’t know. Nobody knows. Because that shit takes time to sort out. It takes years of watching and re-watching and cultural commentary and perspective to mark a film as being a true classic. That’s why, this year, I am announcing the 20/20 Oscars, a (hopefully) annual event here on Unshaved Mouse. Every year we will look back on what was being considered 20 years ago and vote in the major categories and this time we will get it right.

So, 19 years ago the 71st Academy Awards were voting on 1999’s crop of movies. It was a pretty good year overall, with plenty of films that could benefit some hindsight. Vote below and we will announce the results on Oscar night.

Best Picture

 

17 comments

  1. Although I didn’t vote for it, I honestly think American Beauty was a fine choice. It’s so much the perfect movie for its moment, absolutely capturing the middle-aged ennui that so many were feeling in 1999. 20 years later, to a different generation, that just feels off. But being the perfect piece of art for your moment doesn’t make it bad art just because you didn’t age gracefully; it wasn’t built to.

    And its mixture of snark, psychological drama, and fantasy remains entertaining and often compelling in its just off-beat weirdness. Spacey quitting his job, blackmailing his boss, and then taking a fast food job to express just how much mild comfort hiding so much that’s broken underneath is brilliant. And Spacey’s performance is dead-on; you feel every moment of his arc, right up to the climactic realization that, honestly, he’s got it pretty good, and he’s doing fine, and should have figured that out a long time ago.

    Oh, and that Conrad Hall cinematography *especially* deserved its Oscar.

    Having said that, I wrote in “The Straight Story” for Best Picture and voted the Wachowskis for Director. The perfect piece of art for its time is fine; Straight Story and Matrix are timeless classics, and that was clear *then*.

  2. Cool, but I wasn’t alive 20 years ago, so I don’t know if I can vote.

    Looking forward to your write up on the Frozen 2 teaser though!

  3. Cool idea. Really reminds me how many great movies came out in 1999.

    And also how many have been on my “I should watch that” list for 20 years.

  4. I’ve seen only like two or three of the movies listed so I don’t feel qualified to vote, but I WILL say that I saw Being John Malcovitch when I was eleven or twelve and that’s an experience I cannot reccomend.

  5. Can you imagine that even after all this years I still haven’t watched all movies on this list? So I will take a pass on voting this round, because even the ones I know are good but also deeply flawed movies.

    I will say that if the question were most influential movie, I might go for The Matrix.

  6. Tough choices, and not just because I don’t really remember most of the films from 1999.
    Though I will say right off the bat I won’t be voting for Russel Crowe, how a guy that consistently lifeless and one-note keeps getting work is beyond me.

  7. I don’t know most of the actors’ performances, but I did cast a couple of votes for Magnolia to make up for the Academy snubbing it by not sacrificing a virgin to a volcano in its honor. (Fucking liberals.)

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