Waterford Whispers News is Ireland’s answer to The Onion, a parody news website that frequently produces satire that is often as brilliant and biting as it is poorly proof-read.
Well because WWN published a satirical article entitled “Denis O’Brien Receives 20 Year Jail Sentence For Mobile Phone Licence Bribe in Parallel Universe”. O’Brien’s lawyers responded thought this was so hi-larious that they threatened WWN with legal action, forcing the site to remove the post.
Clearly, this can only mean one thing.
Denis O’Brien has won. That article, the last feeble gasp of defiance against his stranglehold on the Irish media has been quashed. That article shall never be seen by anyone again, and Denis O’Brien can rest easy knowing that he has triumphed totally and utterly and oh look here’s the entire thing courtesy of Imgur…
Oh well. I’m sure that was just a once off. A glitch it the system. Surely that article will never again resurface on the internet oh lord amercy there it is again…
Oh, you know what, let’s mix things up. Here’s a picture of Denis O’Brien and the article slipping each other the tongue.
You can do so much better, article. Oh, here’s the article explaining to Denis O’Brien that these cows are small, but those cows over there are far away…
Here they are as two cats, apropos of absolutely fucking nothing.
Oh, and here’s the article as Batman, smacking his plucky sidekick Denis O’Brien right in the kisser.
I could go on but they get increasingly pornographic. On the very unlikely chance that Mr O’Brien or his legal representatives are reading this, I would like to say something.
Mr O’Brien. Denis. Denny. Del Boy. Fuckface.
Free speech is, in my opinion, the single most vital freedom in any society. We can deal with any issue, problem or injustice in our nation as long as we have the freedom to debate those issues, problems and injustices. And, I’m afraid, yes. That includes you. And your massive wealth that, as is now a matter of public record, was partially derived from corruption. And it includes the malign influence you have have had on this nation’s press, media and politics. It includes the fact that you have, in the words of one foreign journalist,”wiped away the bedrock of any society claiming to be democratic”. It includes the fact that you are the cancer at the heart of our nation.
And, apparently, it includes the fact that you’ve never heard of the Streisand effect.
*Yes that’s a typo. Yes, I realise that after the crack about WWN’s proof-reading that makes me look like a tit. Yes, I’m leaving it in because I figure I need to take my lumps.
Thanks for this mouse. What an asshat. I hope he gets his ass kicked someday.
It seems there’s a small protest going on on twitter at the moment with the hashtag DOBfilms – it’s somewhat entertaining.
If Trump ever becomes President of the USA, how long before he and Kim Jong-Un get into a penis envy contest that somehow ends in World War III?
Ever the optimist, I see!
“The Waterford Whispers is Ireland’s answer to The Onion, a parody news website that frequently produces satire that is often as brilliant and biting as it is poorly proof-read.”
“He has used this position to quash reporting of his financial affairs in the Irish media, in one case even forcing the Sunday Independent to stop mid-press to remove a single sentence that remove a single sentence identifying him as the controlling shareholder of INM.”
Ha! You got me.
It’s Waterford Whispers News or WWN btw. People in glasshouses etc. . . .
You have said too much already! I can see the winged monkeys on the horizon.
Pray for me.
excellent piece. however you should proof read your own piece before you comment on WWN’s proof reading skills
Hangs head in shame
Good shit! :)) Cheers!
Uh-oh, getting on a bigshot’s bad side, huh? I bet Denis is cursing Saint Patrick that Ireland doesn’t have any snakes to sic on you for this. Though then again, Denis doesn’t have any trade connections with Australia, does he?
Also, I object to what you said about Donald; his mother clearly would not need to waste her precious hours cutting that toupee. Speaking of him, I wonder if you can use your brilliant influence to keep him out of the White House like you did Mitt. Your trip to that alternate universe must have left you informed enough of the dangers of putting someone named Donald in a position of power.